1
00:00:46,500 --> 00:00:50,000
I was right. I was right.
2
00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:52,800
Now, that's nice. That's
got me, that's good.
3
00:00:52,900 --> 00:00:54,900
Most people don't
get me, you know.
4
00:00:55,600 --> 00:00:58,500
Nobody's direct anymore,
you notice this?
5
00:00:58,600 --> 00:01:01,600
Everybody's got, like,
a secret language.
6
00:01:01,700 --> 00:01:05,000
It's like a code for what
they really wanna say.
7
00:01:05,000 --> 00:01:07,600
Like the doctor who first
told me my son was autistic.
8
00:01:07,700 --> 00:01:10,400
You know, he says to me, he says,
"You know, the autistic mind
9
00:01:10,500 --> 00:01:15,000
is wired in brilliant
and revolutionary ways."
10
00:01:15,100 --> 00:01:17,500
I said, "Oh, yeah?
11
00:01:17,600 --> 00:01:19,100
How so?"
12
00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:21,500
Because, you know,
my son didn't speak.
13
00:01:21,600 --> 00:01:24,100
Didn't speak at all for years.
14
00:01:24,200 --> 00:01:26,500
Communicated only
in grunts, growls
15
00:01:26,600 --> 00:01:28,700
and ear-piercing screams.
16
00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:39,100
And then when he finally started
speaking, he wouldn't shut up.
17
00:01:39,200 --> 00:01:42,500
It's true. He
wouldn't. He wouldn't.
18
00:01:42,600 --> 00:01:45,400
That doctor could've saved us both a
lot of time if he'd just said the truth.
19
00:01:45,400 --> 00:01:48,000
Just slap those bitches,
and show 'em who's boss!
20
00:01:48,100 --> 00:01:51,000
- Ezra!
- Autistic kids don't give a fuck, man.
21
00:01:51,100 --> 00:01:55,000
- Say my name! Say my name!
- They don't. They don't.
22
00:02:03,300 --> 00:02:04,900
You look good.
23
00:02:05,500 --> 00:02:07,000
How's work?
24
00:02:07,100 --> 00:02:08,200
Good.
25
00:02:09,300 --> 00:02:10,900
When did Ezra see Breaking Bad?
26
00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:13,200
We binged it last weekend.
27
00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:18,200
- Maybe we should be a little more careful.
- What... what do you mean?
28
00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:20,200
He's been reading the New
York Times since he was five.
29
00:02:20,200 --> 00:02:21,600
He can handle Walter White.
30
00:02:21,700 --> 00:02:24,000
- Thank you for coming in.
- Hi!
31
00:02:24,100 --> 00:02:26,400
- Hi, Jenna.
- Mrs. Lee, hi. Nice to see you.
32
00:02:26,500 --> 00:02:28,800
Max, you both know Dr. Tamarova.
33
00:02:28,900 --> 00:02:30,100
Mm-hmm.
34
00:02:31,400 --> 00:02:33,300
Ezra, please stay with Anthony.
35
00:02:33,400 --> 00:02:35,600
Hi, hi, Ms. Cathro.
36
00:02:35,700 --> 00:02:37,000
Uh, what... what's happening?
37
00:02:37,100 --> 00:02:39,000
Why is Ezra not with
the rest of the class?
38
00:02:39,100 --> 00:02:40,600
He's really been
acting out today.
39
00:02:40,700 --> 00:02:42,300
I have other students
who want to learn,
40
00:02:42,400 --> 00:02:43,700
who count on me
to keep them safe.
41
00:02:43,800 --> 00:02:45,600
- I'm getting so tired of this shit.
- Max, please.
42
00:02:45,700 --> 00:02:47,800
No, you know that he's
bullied here, right?
43
00:02:47,900 --> 00:02:50,900
Yeah, maybe he was trying to make
that vicious little kid laugh.
44
00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:53,000
Ezzie came home with a
bloody lip last week.
45
00:02:53,100 --> 00:02:54,400
Anybody get expelled for that?
46
00:02:54,500 --> 00:02:55,800
Spoke to that boy's
parents as well.
47
00:02:55,800 --> 00:02:57,100
Right, but Ezzie's the bad one.
48
00:02:57,200 --> 00:02:58,600
No, no, Ezra is not bad,
49
00:02:58,700 --> 00:03:01,100
but today, he was a danger
to himself and others.
50
00:03:01,200 --> 00:03:03,300
There it is, there it
is. The secret language.
51
00:03:03,400 --> 00:03:05,000
- I was waiting for it.
- Max.
52
00:03:05,100 --> 00:03:06,900
- Huh?
- Max! Stop.
53
00:03:11,100 --> 00:03:14,900
You can't expel him. He's
been working very, very hard.
54
00:03:15,000 --> 00:03:16,900
And, yes, he has
had his bad days,
55
00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:19,900
but he's also met
a lot of the goals
56
00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:21,400
that you set for him.
57
00:03:21,500 --> 00:03:23,500
Ms. Lee, please.
58
00:03:24,500 --> 00:03:26,400
Y-You can't drop him.
59
00:03:26,700 --> 00:03:29,000
Max, this autism
shit, it's depressing.
60
00:03:29,100 --> 00:03:30,700
You can talk about
whatever you want
61
00:03:30,800 --> 00:03:32,200
if you give us a reason
to want to listen.
62
00:03:32,300 --> 00:03:34,900
And I want to listen. I
think my cousin's autistic.
63
00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:37,800
- But it's gotta be funny.
- See, the sign says comedy on it.
64
00:03:37,900 --> 00:03:39,800
- It's not a funeral parlor.
- Huh.
65
00:03:39,900 --> 00:03:41,200
What is this, a
fucking intervention?
66
00:03:41,300 --> 00:03:44,300
I disagree. You need
to go deeper, further.
67
00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:45,600
Make a whole set out of it.
68
00:03:45,700 --> 00:03:46,900
Well, make a whole
evening out of it.
69
00:03:47,000 --> 00:03:48,800
You know, "Disabilities
with Max."
70
00:03:48,900 --> 00:03:50,700
Well, I'm not telling
jokes. I'm storytelling.
71
00:03:50,800 --> 00:03:52,600
I know you're not, but
you gotta make it funny.
72
00:03:52,600 --> 00:03:54,800
Sad stories, Jackie, you
should see his sad stories.
73
00:03:54,900 --> 00:03:56,200
Oh, I've seen 'em plenty.
74
00:03:56,300 --> 00:03:57,400
Divorce is not for pussies.
75
00:03:57,500 --> 00:03:59,000
Nosy, dark, and sexy.
76
00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:00,800
Sorry to interrupt, I
just wanted to tell you
77
00:04:00,800 --> 00:04:02,500
- I loved your set.
- There you go.
78
00:04:02,600 --> 00:04:04,500
- Thank you.
- You're welcome. I'm Susan.
79
00:04:04,600 --> 00:04:05,800
Can I buy you a drink?
80
00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:09,100
I'd save the dough.
This guy is in mourning.
81
00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:16,800
Hey.
82
00:04:16,900 --> 00:04:19,400
- Are you crying?
- Ah, come on.
83
00:04:22,400 --> 00:04:24,000
I'll call you.
84
00:04:24,800 --> 00:04:26,000
Really?
85
00:04:27,100 --> 00:04:28,400
No.
86
00:04:41,700 --> 00:04:44,100
He cried, didn't he?
87
00:04:45,500 --> 00:04:48,200
It's his kid, my grandson.
88
00:04:52,100 --> 00:04:53,100
You hungry?
89
00:04:53,200 --> 00:04:55,300
Fix you something to eat.
90
00:05:03,600 --> 00:05:05,200
It's a bigger number
than we discussed,
91
00:05:05,300 --> 00:05:08,700
but it's exactly the
neighborhood that you wanted.
92
00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:10,500
Listen, th-there
are multiple bids,
93
00:05:10,600 --> 00:05:13,700
so I think we have to
come in above the ask.
94
00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:17,300
I wish that wasn't the
case, but, unfortunately,
95
00:05:17,300 --> 00:05:19,600
it's still a seller's market.
96
00:05:19,600 --> 00:05:21,900
Ezra! Breakfast!
97
00:05:41,700 --> 00:05:44,800
- Where'd you get the shirt?
- Come on. Cut it out. It's not your shirt.
98
00:05:44,900 --> 00:05:47,800
- You sure it's not my shirt?
- I'm sure.
99
00:05:50,400 --> 00:05:53,500
Enrico moved to the Ritz.
100
00:05:53,600 --> 00:05:55,600
And my building is
still a union house,
101
00:05:55,800 --> 00:05:57,100
and there's an
opening now, so...
102
00:05:57,200 --> 00:05:59,400
- Yeah?
- I want you to consider that.
103
00:05:59,500 --> 00:06:00,900
Yeah, okay.
104
00:06:00,900 --> 00:06:02,600
I'm just not gonna be a
doorman, Pop, thank you.
105
00:06:02,600 --> 00:06:04,300
There's nothing wrong
with being a doorman.
106
00:06:04,400 --> 00:06:08,000
And a man your age shouldn't
be living with his father.
107
00:06:08,600 --> 00:06:12,300
They're expelling
him. They expelled Ez.
108
00:06:12,400 --> 00:06:14,100
They want me to put him
in a special needs school.
109
00:06:14,100 --> 00:06:16,900
Nah, none of it's special.
It's all bullshit.
110
00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:20,200
Yeah, there it is, they're
recommending drugs.
111
00:06:22,200 --> 00:06:24,400
Put him in a gym, let him
work off that special sauce.
112
00:06:24,500 --> 00:06:26,300
- Yeah.
- But you gotta keep fighting.
113
00:06:26,400 --> 00:06:28,800
Yeah, keep fighting, right. You
know how much that's costing me?
114
00:06:28,800 --> 00:06:30,200
I'm paying for her
lawyer, my lawyer.
115
00:06:30,200 --> 00:06:32,100
Jenna knows I'm broke.
Can I have a fork, please?
116
00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:34,300
She knows you're still not over
her, too. That's one thing.
117
00:06:34,300 --> 00:06:37,100
Just cut it out already, all
right? Give me a break. Come on.
118
00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:39,400
Okay, who cries after
fucking a stranger?
119
00:06:39,500 --> 00:06:42,000
That's crazy. You
gotta move on, kiddo.
120
00:06:42,100 --> 00:06:44,200
Believe me, I know what it's like
to fuck things up with a woman
121
00:06:44,200 --> 00:06:46,300
and to get stuck with
a kid on top of it.
122
00:06:46,400 --> 00:06:48,700
More coffee?
123
00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:52,000
Yeah, what, am I new
here? I'll take a coffee.
124
00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:56,000
Tell me something good, Jayne.
125
00:06:56,100 --> 00:06:58,600
I have something
really, really good.
126
00:06:58,700 --> 00:07:00,600
I'm not doing it. Nah,
I write for me now.
127
00:07:00,700 --> 00:07:02,000
- Come here.
- For me.
128
00:07:02,100 --> 00:07:03,300
Come here.
129
00:07:03,400 --> 00:07:04,700
I'm not sitting on your lap.
130
00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:06,000
I got something to tell you.
131
00:07:06,100 --> 00:07:07,500
Come on.
132
00:07:07,600 --> 00:07:09,100
You don't want me to get up.
133
00:07:09,200 --> 00:07:12,400
All right, no one's gonna
hire me in late night anymore.
134
00:07:12,500 --> 00:07:14,500
Conan fucking blackballed me.
135
00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:16,600
Well, you punched
him in the balls.
136
00:07:16,700 --> 00:07:18,200
Well, I was aiming
for his stomach.
137
00:07:18,400 --> 00:07:20,300
He's so fucking tall!
138
00:07:22,500 --> 00:07:24,200
Why are you so crazy?
139
00:07:24,300 --> 00:07:28,100
Listen, Robert Segal has
heard great things about you.
140
00:07:28,200 --> 00:07:30,300
Robert Segal. What,
Kimmel's booker?
141
00:07:30,400 --> 00:07:32,800
He wants to see you down
at the Cellar tonight.
142
00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:34,700
No, I can't. I
can't do it tonight.
143
00:07:34,800 --> 00:07:36,600
I'm taking Ezzie to The
Big Lebowski tribute.
144
00:07:36,700 --> 00:07:39,200
We're gonna dress up like the
characters, throw shit at the screen.
145
00:07:39,200 --> 00:07:41,800
- It's gonna be awesome.
- That's all cute, but not tonight.
146
00:07:41,900 --> 00:07:43,200
I can't. I can't
let the dude down.
147
00:07:43,200 --> 00:07:45,700
You wanna do something
for your son?
148
00:07:45,800 --> 00:07:49,200
You get Mr. Segal to
book you on Mr. Kimmel.
149
00:07:49,300 --> 00:07:52,200
Okay, ready? I'm
getting the costume.
150
00:07:52,400 --> 00:07:53,500
Okay.
151
00:07:54,400 --> 00:07:56,200
Okay, this is cozy.
152
00:07:59,600 --> 00:08:02,200
- This is gonna be itchy.
- I know.
153
00:08:02,200 --> 00:08:03,300
Okay.
154
00:08:05,400 --> 00:08:07,300
- Okay.
- Wait, not now, I got it.
155
00:08:07,400 --> 00:08:10,700
I got it.
156
00:08:10,900 --> 00:08:13,800
You look so cute!
157
00:08:13,900 --> 00:08:16,800
I'm sorry! I'm
sorry! I'm sorry!
158
00:08:16,900 --> 00:08:20,000
It's okay. Sorry. It's okay.
159
00:08:20,100 --> 00:08:22,400
I'm sorry, Ezzie. It's okay.
160
00:08:22,600 --> 00:08:24,500
It's okay. It's okay.
161
00:08:25,600 --> 00:08:27,000
It's okay.
162
00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:53,100
I got it, honey.
163
00:08:53,800 --> 00:08:55,600
Wow, look at you.
164
00:08:55,700 --> 00:08:58,700
- So, a lawyer walks into a bar...
- No, no. Don't do that, Bryce.
165
00:08:58,800 --> 00:09:01,100
- It's Bruce.
- Ezzie! Ezzie!
166
00:09:01,100 --> 00:09:02,900
And you're "Hay-zeus,"
the bowler, right?
167
00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:04,800
It's "Jesus," man.
168
00:09:04,900 --> 00:09:06,300
- Jesus.
- Have you not seen the movie?
169
00:09:06,300 --> 00:09:08,700
No, it's been a... oh! And
here's the Big Lebowski!
170
00:09:08,800 --> 00:09:11,200
I'm not Mr. Lebowski.
You're Mr. Lebowski.
171
00:09:11,300 --> 00:09:12,100
I'm The Dude.
172
00:09:12,200 --> 00:09:13,700
Well, not yet you're not.
173
00:09:13,800 --> 00:09:15,400
Let's see.
174
00:09:15,500 --> 00:09:17,200
Now you're The Dude.
175
00:09:17,300 --> 00:09:19,600
Let me see.
176
00:09:19,700 --> 00:09:21,200
Just in case.
177
00:09:21,200 --> 00:09:23,700
Okay, he's with me. He's
not gonna have a meltdown.
178
00:09:23,800 --> 00:09:26,100
Sure. Well, we'll
be back by 9:00,
179
00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:27,900
so just the movie
and straight home.
180
00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:29,600
- Promise?
- Yeah, I promise.
181
00:09:29,700 --> 00:09:30,800
- Okay!
- Okay.
182
00:09:30,900 --> 00:09:32,700
Okay.
183
00:09:32,800 --> 00:09:35,100
- Straight home, guys.
- Yeah. You, too. Okay?
184
00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:37,000
- Have fun!
- All right.
185
00:09:37,100 --> 00:09:39,100
He didn't like my joke.
186
00:09:49,600 --> 00:09:50,800
You're nice.
187
00:09:51,000 --> 00:09:52,700
What's up, buddy?
188
00:09:52,800 --> 00:09:54,200
Jack-Jack-Jacquelyn.
189
00:09:54,300 --> 00:09:56,300
- What's up, Max?
- I'm gonna go get changed.
190
00:09:56,400 --> 00:09:58,200
- Hey, Ezra.
- Hi.
191
00:09:58,200 --> 00:10:00,300
Have you been to a
costume ball, then, love?
192
00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:02,700
No. Big Lebowski,
7:00 p.m. show.
193
00:10:02,800 --> 00:10:04,600
Oh! Great movie. Love it.
194
00:10:04,700 --> 00:10:06,700
I'll have a White Russian.
195
00:10:06,800 --> 00:10:10,000
Virgin White Russian
for The Dude.
196
00:10:10,100 --> 00:10:13,700
Actually, pineapple juice.
I'll have a pineapple juice.
197
00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:23,400
- You make me think of pirates.
- Really? That's weird.
198
00:10:23,500 --> 00:10:24,500
Yes.
199
00:10:24,500 --> 00:10:27,500
Even though the pirate accent
200
00:10:27,600 --> 00:10:29,600
is typically West
Country English.
201
00:10:29,700 --> 00:10:31,400
Yaarrgh!
202
00:10:31,500 --> 00:10:33,700
The Irish are fine pirates.
203
00:10:35,100 --> 00:10:37,900
Oh! Drop the lobe!
Drop the lobe.
204
00:10:38,000 --> 00:10:42,200
Max is stoned,
everyone. Max is stoned.
205
00:10:42,300 --> 00:10:43,200
Really, dude?
206
00:10:43,300 --> 00:10:44,200
I don't know if anyone's
207
00:10:44,300 --> 00:10:46,000
in an interracial relationship.
208
00:10:46,100 --> 00:10:48,000
I'm in one. My
girlfriend's Puerto Rican.
209
00:10:48,100 --> 00:10:50,300
- Yes! Thank you. I appreciate that.
- See him?
210
00:10:50,400 --> 00:10:52,500
Okay, see the guy over
there with glasses?
211
00:10:52,600 --> 00:10:55,300
That's him. Okay, I need
my Ezzie mojo, okay?
212
00:10:55,400 --> 00:10:58,000
You ready to be my
good luck charm?
213
00:10:58,700 --> 00:11:01,100
Find me a more
unhappy human being.
214
00:11:01,200 --> 00:11:04,200
Depressing. Why would I do that?
215
00:11:04,300 --> 00:11:06,300
Don't be so literal,
Ezzie. Come on, let's go.
216
00:11:06,400 --> 00:11:09,200
Every time my dad interacts
with a gay person, he calls me.
217
00:11:09,300 --> 00:11:11,300
Every interaction.
218
00:11:11,400 --> 00:11:13,500
It doesn't matter how small it
is. He called me the other day.
219
00:11:13,500 --> 00:11:15,200
He was like, "Emma, I
was at the grocery store,
220
00:11:15,200 --> 00:11:17,200
and I looked over,
and I saw a lesbian."
221
00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:20,700
And I was like, "That's great, dad.
How did you know she was a lesbian?"
222
00:11:20,700 --> 00:11:23,400
He said "Well, she looked
like you." "Goodbye, Pop!"
223
00:11:23,500 --> 00:11:26,000
Okay, guys, ready
for your next comic?
224
00:11:26,200 --> 00:11:28,600
Gimme the mojo. Gimme
the mojo! Gimme the mojo!
225
00:11:28,700 --> 00:11:30,400
One of my personal favorites.
226
00:11:30,500 --> 00:11:32,900
He was a writer for some of the
biggest names in the business.
227
00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:34,100
Now he writes for himself.
228
00:11:34,200 --> 00:11:35,800
Clap it up for my
buddy, Max Bernal!
229
00:11:35,900 --> 00:11:36,800
Let him hear ya!
230
00:11:36,900 --> 00:11:39,000
Yes!
231
00:11:41,900 --> 00:11:44,700
That's Emma
Willmann! Give it up!
232
00:11:46,100 --> 00:11:48,300
- How we feeling?
- Good.
233
00:11:48,400 --> 00:11:50,600
Now, take it easy.
I don't really care.
234
00:11:50,700 --> 00:11:54,600
My son is here tonight! That's
right. My son is here tonight.
235
00:11:56,100 --> 00:11:57,700
Dying of shame.
236
00:11:57,800 --> 00:11:59,500
Stand up, and take
the wig off, Ez!
237
00:11:59,600 --> 00:12:03,200
Stop talking about me!
238
00:12:03,300 --> 00:12:05,700
Okay. I didn't expect
that. Uh, you know,
239
00:12:05,800 --> 00:12:07,400
try to have a little
respect, okay, Ez?
240
00:12:07,400 --> 00:12:10,000
I'm up here humiliating myself
to give you a better life.
241
00:12:10,100 --> 00:12:12,200
All right.
242
00:12:12,300 --> 00:12:13,900
I'm good to you,
you little prick.
243
00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:16,000
- Not like my old man.
- Pop-Pop!
244
00:12:16,100 --> 00:12:18,100
That's right. Pop-Pop.
245
00:12:18,200 --> 00:12:20,200
That's the last time
he'll speak, by the way.
246
00:12:20,300 --> 00:12:23,300
Pop-Pop, that's actually the
perfect name for my old man.
247
00:12:23,400 --> 00:12:26,100
Pop-Pop. It's like two gunshots.
248
00:12:26,200 --> 00:12:29,400
One to the head, one to
the heart. "Pop! Pop!"
249
00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:30,900
Let me tell you a little
bit about my old man.
250
00:12:30,900 --> 00:12:34,000
This guy, you know, he was a...
one of the top gourmet chefs
251
00:12:34,100 --> 00:12:35,700
in New York City
back in the day.
252
00:12:35,800 --> 00:12:38,400
Worked at all the top
restaurants. It's true, you know.
253
00:12:38,400 --> 00:12:40,700
Every one of which he
got shit-canned from
254
00:12:40,800 --> 00:12:42,800
because nobody could
stand working with him.
255
00:12:42,900 --> 00:12:44,500
I mean, the guy got
driven out of town,
256
00:12:44,600 --> 00:12:47,200
and the only place he
could find a job as a chef
257
00:12:47,300 --> 00:12:49,800
was at a steakhouse in Nebraska.
258
00:12:49,900 --> 00:12:51,900
- Ooh!
- That's right.
259
00:12:51,900 --> 00:12:55,000
You know cuisine
in Nebraska, man.
260
00:12:55,100 --> 00:12:56,800
There isn't any.
261
00:12:56,900 --> 00:13:01,900
I mean, you kill it, they grill
it, you get a Michelin tire, see?
262
00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:04,400
So, I'm five years old,
I'm living in Nebraska,
263
00:13:04,500 --> 00:13:07,200
it's my birthday party, and you
know, it's a lot of pressure.
264
00:13:07,300 --> 00:13:10,000
I mean, you know, I've got these
fat farmers' kids staring at me.
265
00:13:10,100 --> 00:13:14,500
I'm the only thing standing between
them and the cake, so, you know...
266
00:13:14,600 --> 00:13:18,100
Papier-mâché bib, it's 1980, so
you know everything I'm wearing
267
00:13:18,200 --> 00:13:19,600
is made out of napalm.
268
00:13:19,700 --> 00:13:22,300
I bend down, blow
out my candles,
269
00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:24,300
I'm about to do it
when I hear my pop say,
270
00:13:24,400 --> 00:13:27,100
"Blow out your
fucking candles, Max!"
271
00:13:28,200 --> 00:13:31,200
I flinch. I fall forward.
272
00:13:31,300 --> 00:13:34,100
Candle lights me up. I light
up like a fucking road flare.
273
00:13:34,200 --> 00:13:36,700
I'm telling you, I am on fire!
274
00:13:36,800 --> 00:13:39,300
My old man, he grabs
his Dr. Pepper,
275
00:13:39,400 --> 00:13:41,500
he puts me out like
a campfire, and says,
276
00:13:41,600 --> 00:13:45,000
"You want some cake, Maxie?"
277
00:13:45,100 --> 00:13:46,500
I says, "No, Pop."
278
00:13:46,600 --> 00:13:50,200
- "I want my eyebrows back!"
- I want my eyebrows back!
279
00:13:51,100 --> 00:13:52,700
Thanks, kid.
280
00:13:52,800 --> 00:13:54,600
I'm gonna go kill my son.
281
00:13:54,700 --> 00:13:57,600
Hey, I think it's great
that you memorized my set,
282
00:13:57,700 --> 00:13:59,500
but you can't be steppin'
on my punchline, buddy.
283
00:13:59,500 --> 00:14:02,000
I can't let the train
go off the rails!
284
00:14:02,100 --> 00:14:04,700
Okay, Ez, here
comes Mr. Happy now.
285
00:14:04,800 --> 00:14:08,600
Okay, just whatever you're thinking,
don't say it, okay, please.
286
00:14:08,700 --> 00:14:10,000
- Good set.
- Thank you.
287
00:14:10,100 --> 00:14:12,100
- I think I'll book your kid.
- Ha!
288
00:14:12,200 --> 00:14:13,600
You're still not funny, Bob.
289
00:14:13,700 --> 00:14:17,000
Ezzie, meet Mr. Segal.
Bob, this is my son, Ezra.
290
00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:19,300
So, um, next week,
a producer comes in
291
00:14:19,400 --> 00:14:21,800
- to see you and Sal Argento.
- All right.
292
00:14:22,000 --> 00:14:25,000
And then, one of you is doing
the Kimmel show in Los Angeles.
293
00:14:25,100 --> 00:14:28,200
Mr. Segal, are you sad
because you're bald?
294
00:14:29,300 --> 00:14:31,100
- He's dark.
- Mm.
295
00:14:31,200 --> 00:14:33,300
Like his daddy.
296
00:14:33,400 --> 00:14:35,300
- Get your best stuff together, Max.
- Okay.
297
00:14:35,400 --> 00:14:39,200
- All right? You're gonna need it.
- All right. All right.
298
00:14:39,500 --> 00:14:42,800
Sad and bald? That's
you not talking?
299
00:14:42,900 --> 00:14:45,500
- I was just asking a question.
- Okay.
300
00:14:45,600 --> 00:14:48,600
Come on, let's get out of here
before your mother kills me.
301
00:14:48,700 --> 00:14:50,500
Sorry. Sorry.
302
00:14:56,800 --> 00:14:58,000
Well...
303
00:15:03,200 --> 00:15:05,500
Oh, my god.
304
00:15:05,600 --> 00:15:07,200
Okay.
305
00:15:07,300 --> 00:15:09,300
Snug as a bug in a rug.
306
00:15:13,500 --> 00:15:15,700
Okay. All right, all right.
307
00:15:15,800 --> 00:15:17,900
I wasn't doing anything.
308
00:15:19,900 --> 00:15:22,600
Hey. We had a good time, right?
309
00:15:22,700 --> 00:15:24,500
Just one more.
310
00:15:24,600 --> 00:15:27,700
All right, all right!
Hey. I love you.
311
00:15:29,400 --> 00:15:30,800
Good night.
312
00:15:36,300 --> 00:15:38,300
Who says autistic kids
can't communicate?
313
00:15:38,400 --> 00:15:41,500
"Ah, get out of my
room!" And I'm out. Yeah.
314
00:15:41,500 --> 00:15:43,500
He's the best
communicator in the world.
315
00:15:43,600 --> 00:15:45,500
You can use the sensory
brush next time.
316
00:15:45,600 --> 00:15:47,800
Nah, nah, nah, the brushing
thing is your thing.
317
00:15:47,900 --> 00:15:49,500
What is he, an alpaca?
318
00:15:49,600 --> 00:15:52,300
You did a set at the Cellar, and
you promised me you wouldn't.
319
00:15:52,400 --> 00:15:54,300
- You're driving me crazy.
- I'm sorry, okay?
320
00:15:54,400 --> 00:15:56,300
A guy from Kimmel
came to see me,
321
00:15:56,400 --> 00:15:59,400
- and I needed my good luck charm, right?
- Oh.
322
00:15:59,500 --> 00:16:01,500
You know me. I
needed my mojo man.
323
00:16:01,600 --> 00:16:04,400
Did you read
Dr. Tamarova's assessment?
324
00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:09,400
Look at you. You are so pretty.
Come on. Give me a kiss.
325
00:16:09,500 --> 00:16:11,100
- Brad's gone already.
- Stop it.
326
00:16:11,200 --> 00:16:13,900
It's Bruce, and
he's in the kitchen.
327
00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:17,400
- Brian is in my kitchen?
- Hi, Max!
328
00:16:17,500 --> 00:16:19,300
You know, he's never
gonna belong in our house.
329
00:16:19,400 --> 00:16:21,600
Max. This is my house.
Did you read it?
330
00:16:21,700 --> 00:16:23,800
Yeah, I read it.
I read it, yes.
331
00:16:23,900 --> 00:16:26,100
But it was a mugging. They
just want him out of there.
332
00:16:26,100 --> 00:16:28,800
The Board of Ed will pay for him
to go to a special needs school.
333
00:16:28,900 --> 00:16:30,300
He doesn't need
a special school.
334
00:16:30,400 --> 00:16:32,900
Max, he led 20 kids
onto Washington Street.
335
00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:35,700
- It was incredibly dangerous.
- Okay, but he's not dangerous.
336
00:16:35,800 --> 00:16:37,100
He's a challenge.
337
00:16:37,200 --> 00:16:39,200
Fuck. Nobody wants to
do the fucking work.
338
00:16:39,300 --> 00:16:42,000
The work? The work.
All I do is work.
339
00:16:42,100 --> 00:16:44,700
You come here, you play dress
up to take him to comedy club.
340
00:16:44,800 --> 00:16:47,000
- Bring him home at midnight.
- That's not what I meant, okay?
341
00:16:47,100 --> 00:16:48,300
Look, we're on the
same team, Jen.
342
00:16:48,300 --> 00:16:51,200
You know how he thinks.
I know how he thinks.
343
00:16:51,300 --> 00:16:53,200
He just needs to be
seen, Jen, you know?
344
00:16:53,300 --> 00:16:57,500
And heard and... and appreciated
for what he has to offer.
345
00:16:57,600 --> 00:17:00,100
Yes, yes, but he also needs
to be able to give us a hug
346
00:17:00,200 --> 00:17:02,000
without screaming.
347
00:17:04,200 --> 00:17:05,500
It's an opportunity, Max.
348
00:17:05,600 --> 00:17:09,000
He'll be with trained
teachers and aides
349
00:17:09,200 --> 00:17:10,300
in a school built for him,
350
00:17:10,400 --> 00:17:12,400
how he needs to learn.
351
00:17:13,500 --> 00:17:14,900
No bullies.
352
00:17:16,500 --> 00:17:19,000
He'll be with kids
just like him.
353
00:17:21,300 --> 00:17:23,700
- Nice. Kids like him, huh?
- Okay.
354
00:17:23,800 --> 00:17:26,500
- That's not what I meant.
- You know what? I know what you meant.
355
00:17:26,700 --> 00:17:29,100
Here's the thing,
I'm a kid like him.
356
00:17:29,200 --> 00:17:32,600
And kids like us, you know what we
need? To be with all kinds of kids.
357
00:17:32,700 --> 00:17:36,500
So, no, I will not accept her
recommendation fucking ever.
358
00:17:48,600 --> 00:17:50,700
- You all right?
- No.
359
00:17:52,200 --> 00:17:53,500
It never fails!
360
00:17:53,600 --> 00:17:55,000
Every time we get
close to something
361
00:17:55,100 --> 00:17:56,100
that might actually work,
362
00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:57,900
Max has to blow it up!
363
00:17:58,000 --> 00:18:00,500
This is the third school that
Ezra's been expelled from.
364
00:18:00,600 --> 00:18:04,100
There's no other options.
What am I supposed to do?
365
00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:06,700
Well, I could get
rid of Max for you.
366
00:18:06,800 --> 00:18:08,900
- Oh, you can do that for me?
- Yeah. I'm a lawyer.
367
00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:10,400
I have no moral compass.
368
00:18:10,500 --> 00:18:14,600
Besides, I know a guy. They
call him Jimmy the Hatchet.
369
00:18:14,700 --> 00:18:18,900
Bang, bang, bitches. Cut off his
head, and feed him to the fishes!
370
00:18:31,500 --> 00:18:35,000
Get down! Get down!
371
00:18:46,600 --> 00:18:48,200
It won't be too much
longer, sweetie,
372
00:18:48,300 --> 00:18:50,900
but you scared the
hell out of me.
373
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:56,500
Honey, why'd you sneak out
of the house like that?
374
00:18:56,600 --> 00:18:59,400
Hmm? Please don't do that ever.
375
00:19:00,300 --> 00:19:04,300
- Say you'll never do that.
- I won't ever do that.
376
00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:06,700
Miss Demuzio saw you
run in the street,
377
00:19:06,800 --> 00:19:09,000
and then a taxi came
out and then he hit you.
378
00:19:09,100 --> 00:19:11,200
- I mean, you could've been...
- A dog tried to bite me.
379
00:19:11,200 --> 00:19:13,300
I had to get away
from his teeth.
380
00:19:13,400 --> 00:19:15,600
Hey, Jen. They're
almost ready for him.
381
00:19:15,700 --> 00:19:17,200
No!
382
00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:19,400
- It's okay.
- Hey.
383
00:19:19,500 --> 00:19:22,300
- Hey. Dad's here.
- What's happening?
384
00:19:22,300 --> 00:19:24,100
Hey, buddy. Hey, hey. You okay?
385
00:19:24,300 --> 00:19:27,400
What's going on?
Huh? What happened?
386
00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:30,400
- 14th Street Viaduct to Manhattan Avenue.
- What?
387
00:19:30,500 --> 00:19:32,700
- Three blocks to the park at...
- Hey, hey, I know...
388
00:19:32,800 --> 00:19:34,800
- I know you know where Pop-Pop lives.
- I'm sorry.
389
00:19:34,900 --> 00:19:37,500
Don't be sorry, okay?
Just tell me what...
390
00:19:37,600 --> 00:19:39,000
- You're mad.
- No, I'm not mad.
391
00:19:39,100 --> 00:19:40,400
Okay, I'm not mad...
392
00:19:40,500 --> 00:19:42,300
Okay, you know what? Yeah,
I'm a little bit mad.
393
00:19:42,300 --> 00:19:44,300
Eyes. Eyes. Ezzie.
394
00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:48,800
- What were you doing running outs...
- Can I talk to you for a second?
395
00:19:49,900 --> 00:19:51,100
Hey...
396
00:19:54,800 --> 00:19:56,500
Ezra Bernal.
397
00:19:56,600 --> 00:19:59,000
- Why's he in the middle of the hallway?
- They need to run tests.
398
00:19:59,000 --> 00:20:01,400
What do you mean tests? What
tests? You mean like X-rays?
399
00:20:01,500 --> 00:20:03,200
- Psych evaluation.
- What do you mean psych eval...
400
00:20:03,300 --> 00:20:06,100
Hey, where you going?
Hey, no, thanks.
401
00:20:06,100 --> 00:20:08,100
- I had the same reaction.
- What psych evaluation?
402
00:20:08,100 --> 00:20:10,200
- He got hit by a cab.
- It's protocol for children.
403
00:20:10,300 --> 00:20:13,200
- Excuse me. Is there a problem?
- Yeah. We need to see a doctor, please.
404
00:20:13,200 --> 00:20:16,700
- I'm Dr. Kaplan.
- Oh, okay. We... hey, stop!
405
00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:18,700
Sir, you need to let
the man do his job.
406
00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:20,800
Yes. Let's just relax. Just...
407
00:20:20,900 --> 00:20:22,800
- Dad?
- Yeah, I'm right here, buddy.
408
00:20:22,900 --> 00:20:24,500
- We're here, honey.
- Don't worry.
409
00:20:24,600 --> 00:20:27,700
We're gonna sort this
out in a minute, okay?
410
00:20:44,500 --> 00:20:46,500
They made me draw pictures,
411
00:20:46,600 --> 00:20:50,500
stuck lights in my eyes
and asked me questions.
412
00:20:51,400 --> 00:20:53,400
What kind of questions?
413
00:20:53,500 --> 00:20:58,100
They asked me if Mom or
Dad ever tried to hit me.
414
00:20:58,200 --> 00:21:00,800
If I had ever tried
to hurt myself.
415
00:21:02,300 --> 00:21:05,700
Okay, I'm sorry they asked
you that kind of stuff.
416
00:21:06,500 --> 00:21:10,900
Are they gonna make me live
417
00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:12,600
somewhere else?
418
00:21:13,300 --> 00:21:15,700
- Like in a hospital?
- No.
419
00:21:15,800 --> 00:21:17,300
They can't.
420
00:21:17,400 --> 00:21:20,700
You have family, and they
have to answer to us.
421
00:21:20,900 --> 00:21:24,800
- So, that's not gonna happen.
- Okay.
422
00:21:24,900 --> 00:21:26,300
Next move.
423
00:21:26,300 --> 00:21:29,300
- You sure you want to do that?
- Oh, yeah.
424
00:21:29,400 --> 00:21:31,300
KO.
425
00:21:31,400 --> 00:21:34,100
You had to do that,
didn't you, huh?
426
00:21:37,400 --> 00:21:39,100
Hi.
427
00:21:39,200 --> 00:21:40,600
Thank you for your patience.
428
00:21:40,700 --> 00:21:43,100
I know it's been a long night.
429
00:21:43,100 --> 00:21:44,300
I have some good news.
430
00:21:44,400 --> 00:21:46,300
We are going to send
Ezra home this morning.
431
00:21:46,400 --> 00:21:48,700
But because of his age
432
00:21:48,800 --> 00:21:51,200
and because a witness saw
him run in front of a cab...
433
00:21:51,300 --> 00:21:52,500
That's bullshit.
434
00:21:52,600 --> 00:21:53,900
Please. Let him finish.
435
00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:56,000
Ezzie would never just
run in front of a cab.
436
00:21:56,100 --> 00:21:58,400
- Just listen to the doctor.
- I know this is traumatic,
437
00:21:58,500 --> 00:22:00,500
but I'm doing what the
law says I must do.
438
00:22:00,600 --> 00:22:02,300
Ezra is technically
a ward of the state.
439
00:22:02,400 --> 00:22:05,200
- You don't have that right.
- Legally, he does actually.
440
00:22:05,300 --> 00:22:06,600
Let's just hear the doctor out.
441
00:22:06,700 --> 00:22:08,500
Ezra has a history of fleeing
442
00:22:08,600 --> 00:22:10,000
and putting himself in danger.
443
00:22:10,100 --> 00:22:13,400
Now, I'm not going to put him
into a pediatric psych ward.
444
00:22:13,500 --> 00:22:17,700
But I am going to require him to
attend a school for special needs.
445
00:22:17,800 --> 00:22:21,300
And I would like to try a
prescription for Risperdal.
446
00:22:22,100 --> 00:22:23,900
Risperdal? That's
an antipsychotic.
447
00:22:24,000 --> 00:22:26,600
- Your son has been a danger to himself.
- He has not!
448
00:22:26,700 --> 00:22:29,400
Max! He nearly
died! That happened.
449
00:22:29,500 --> 00:22:31,100
Just let him finish.
Let him finish.
450
00:22:31,200 --> 00:22:33,800
We are going to revisit
this in three months.
451
00:22:33,900 --> 00:22:37,300
But right now, Risperdal
is the correct medication.
452
00:22:42,800 --> 00:22:45,000
- Max.
- No, no. I just...
453
00:22:45,000 --> 00:22:47,400
- You got a lot of Risperdal here.
- Max.
454
00:22:47,500 --> 00:22:50,400
What do the drug companies give
you for pushing this on kids?
455
00:22:50,500 --> 00:22:51,700
You get a free fucking badge?
456
00:22:51,800 --> 00:22:53,600
- Hey, Max, come on. Take it easy.
- Take it easy.
457
00:22:53,600 --> 00:22:55,600
Now, I see where the
dangerous behavior comes from.
458
00:22:55,600 --> 00:22:57,600
- Oh, excuse me?
- Max!
459
00:22:57,700 --> 00:22:59,500
You son of a bitch!
460
00:23:04,900 --> 00:23:06,900
- No. I'm not doing that.
- Max.
461
00:23:07,000 --> 00:23:08,600
I got Dr. Wells to drop
the assault charge,
462
00:23:08,600 --> 00:23:10,700
- but you gotta go with the program.
- Fuck that guy.
463
00:23:10,800 --> 00:23:13,200
- He's a drug dealer.
- He's in control is what he is.
464
00:23:13,300 --> 00:23:16,900
Of the special ed school,
the medications, all of it.
465
00:23:19,400 --> 00:23:23,000
And what about the, uh,
about the restraining order?
466
00:23:24,700 --> 00:23:27,800
Three months. You
can't go near Ezra.
467
00:23:27,900 --> 00:23:31,200
I'm sorry. It's the
judge's decision.
468
00:23:31,300 --> 00:23:34,400
I can probably get it down to a
month if you use the behavior cards.
469
00:23:34,500 --> 00:23:36,900
Fuck those cards.
He pisses on those.
470
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:40,400
You want to go home or you wanna
spend another night in here?
471
00:23:40,500 --> 00:23:42,100
It's up to you.
472
00:23:56,500 --> 00:23:59,500
Must have been humiliating being
rescued by your wife's boyfriend.
473
00:23:59,600 --> 00:24:01,300
Please stop talking.
474
00:24:01,400 --> 00:24:03,300
She's obsessed with
this retard crap.
475
00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:05,400
Hey, what's wrong with you, huh?
476
00:24:05,500 --> 00:24:09,600
Nobody says "retard" anymore,
okay? Nobody. Don't say it again.
477
00:24:09,700 --> 00:24:11,600
Okay. I won't say it.
478
00:24:13,700 --> 00:24:15,300
You know, it's a
felony having this.
479
00:24:15,400 --> 00:24:16,600
That's a lot of bullshit.
480
00:24:16,800 --> 00:24:19,200
I served my country. I
have a right to have this.
481
00:24:19,300 --> 00:24:21,300
Food. You served food.
482
00:24:23,800 --> 00:24:27,500
I had no choice. Now they're
telling me I can't see Ezra.
483
00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:31,100
I... I got no say in what
drugs they're gonna give him.
484
00:24:31,100 --> 00:24:34,500
What school they're gonna
put him in. What the f...
485
00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:40,800
You got anything to say?
486
00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:44,700
- She cut you out good. I know.
- She didn't do this.
487
00:24:44,900 --> 00:24:46,600
She didn't have to. I just
picked you up from prison.
488
00:24:46,600 --> 00:24:47,800
What are you talking about?
489
00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:49,500
- That's the best you got?
- What am I gonna say?
490
00:24:49,500 --> 00:24:51,500
You rush in blind, you
get knocked on your ass.
491
00:24:51,600 --> 00:24:52,900
You can't control
your own power,
492
00:24:52,900 --> 00:24:54,100
then what the hell
do you have? Nothing.
493
00:24:54,100 --> 00:24:55,600
Says the guy who
knocked out a customer
494
00:24:55,600 --> 00:24:56,700
because his steak
was overcooked?
495
00:24:56,700 --> 00:24:57,800
That was a perfect steak.
496
00:24:57,900 --> 00:24:59,200
Ah, you see now, there it is.
497
00:24:59,500 --> 00:25:01,500
- There's my twisted moral compass.
- That's right. Whatever.
498
00:25:01,500 --> 00:25:02,600
Whatever's right. Yeah.
499
00:25:02,800 --> 00:25:04,200
Maybe if that were true,
we'd still be in Nebraska,
500
00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:07,200
I'd still have a mother,
what do you think?
501
00:25:07,600 --> 00:25:09,000
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
502
00:25:09,000 --> 00:25:11,000
Stop.
503
00:25:11,100 --> 00:25:13,400
I'm sorry, all right?
504
00:25:13,500 --> 00:25:15,100
I just... I didn't
mean to bring that up.
505
00:25:15,300 --> 00:25:17,800
Fucking guy says to me, "Hey, stupid,
there's no blood on my plate."
506
00:25:17,800 --> 00:25:19,900
I say, "Hey, I'm sorry."
And I punch him in the face.
507
00:25:19,900 --> 00:25:21,400
I say, "Now there is
blood on your plate."
508
00:25:21,400 --> 00:25:23,400
What are you talking about?
I'm talking about my mother.
509
00:25:23,400 --> 00:25:25,400
Now what, now you're gonna
start blaming everything
510
00:25:25,400 --> 00:25:27,500
that's wrong with you and your
life on me and your mother?
511
00:25:27,500 --> 00:25:29,400
Get the fuck out of here!
512
00:25:29,500 --> 00:25:31,000
You know what? You're
a fucking asshole!
513
00:25:31,000 --> 00:25:33,500
Fuck you. Learn how to
fucking cook a steak.
514
00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:35,800
Move the car!
515
00:25:37,300 --> 00:25:38,500
Got it?
516
00:25:45,400 --> 00:25:46,700
Good job.
517
00:25:52,200 --> 00:25:54,100
Do you really think you should
wear the dinosaur costume
518
00:25:54,100 --> 00:25:56,000
on your first day
at a new school?
519
00:25:56,100 --> 00:25:57,200
Hmm.
520
00:25:58,400 --> 00:26:00,300
Hey, it's gonna be great.
521
00:26:00,400 --> 00:26:05,000
There's gonna be all these new kids,
and you're gonna find the nicest ones.
522
00:26:08,800 --> 00:26:10,500
Hey, psst, Ezra.
523
00:26:11,400 --> 00:26:12,700
Ezzie.
524
00:26:14,600 --> 00:26:15,900
Ezzie.
525
00:26:44,700 --> 00:26:46,800
Okay, everybody. Inside!
526
00:26:54,700 --> 00:26:57,000
You've got to head in, Ezra.
527
00:26:59,800 --> 00:27:02,700
What class do you have? Art?
528
00:27:09,200 --> 00:27:10,900
You know, I was thinking
about it recently.
529
00:27:11,000 --> 00:27:13,000
This fucked-up game we used
to play when I was a kid.
530
00:27:13,100 --> 00:27:15,000
You remember Musical Chairs?
531
00:27:15,100 --> 00:27:16,300
- Yeah!
- Yeah?
532
00:27:16,400 --> 00:27:19,100
- Whoo!
- Whoo! Really? Jesus Christ!
533
00:27:19,100 --> 00:27:22,100
It's like a roomful of
pharmaceutical executives.
534
00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:24,700
You know, I was thinking
about this game.
535
00:27:24,800 --> 00:27:26,100
But you know what the catch is.
536
00:27:26,200 --> 00:27:29,700
If you got a dozen kids,
you only got 11 chairs.
537
00:27:29,800 --> 00:27:32,500
So, who doesn't get a chair,
538
00:27:32,600 --> 00:27:36,100
"Fuck you, you're out," right?
539
00:27:36,200 --> 00:27:38,200
Yeah, it's brutal, it's brutal.
540
00:27:38,300 --> 00:27:41,400
I mean, these kids, they turn
into savages, man, right?
541
00:27:41,500 --> 00:27:44,900
They bite each other,
they kick each other.
542
00:27:45,000 --> 00:27:47,700
They poke each other's eyes out.
543
00:27:47,800 --> 00:27:50,200
What sadist invented this game?
544
00:27:51,100 --> 00:27:53,200
And why do they even
call it Musical Chairs?
545
00:27:53,300 --> 00:27:57,400
There's nothing remotely musical
about Musical Chairs, man.
546
00:27:57,500 --> 00:28:01,900
It's like, uh... it's like the
original Squid Game or something.
547
00:28:03,700 --> 00:28:06,500
You know, I just, uh... I got
out of prison a couple days ago.
548
00:28:06,600 --> 00:28:07,800
It's a true story.
549
00:28:07,900 --> 00:28:09,200
Thank you. Thank you.
550
00:28:09,300 --> 00:28:12,400
You know, I, um, put
in some hard time.
551
00:28:12,500 --> 00:28:15,700
Toughest 14 hours of my life.
552
00:28:15,800 --> 00:28:17,400
But, um...
553
00:28:20,100 --> 00:28:22,800
yeah, this doctor, doctor.
554
00:28:22,900 --> 00:28:24,100
Fucking doctor.
555
00:28:24,200 --> 00:28:25,900
Tried to push some
drugs on my kid, so,
556
00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:27,500
you know, I had
to knock him out,
557
00:28:27,600 --> 00:28:30,000
and, uh, they threw me in jail.
558
00:28:31,900 --> 00:28:34,300
Uh, but they offered me a deal.
559
00:28:36,600 --> 00:28:38,200
If I let them give my son
560
00:28:38,300 --> 00:28:42,000
the same drugs they give
to the criminally insane,
561
00:28:42,100 --> 00:28:44,400
they'd drop all the charges.
562
00:28:46,600 --> 00:28:48,500
So I, uh...
563
00:28:51,400 --> 00:28:53,000
took the deal.
564
00:28:55,000 --> 00:28:57,900
My son needed me to
go to bat for him...
565
00:29:04,500 --> 00:29:07,100
and I sold him
right the fuck out.
566
00:29:15,800 --> 00:29:18,400
Where are you? What are
you doing? You have a spot.
567
00:29:18,500 --> 00:29:20,500
- You need to get back here.
- I'm not coming back.
568
00:29:20,600 --> 00:29:25,600
Listen, Max, I really,
really want you to fly.
569
00:29:25,700 --> 00:29:27,500
Really high. I really do.
570
00:29:27,600 --> 00:29:30,700
But you have got to
stop bombing the runway.
571
00:29:30,700 --> 00:29:32,800
You know the bit I did
about the meds and Ez,
572
00:29:32,900 --> 00:29:34,300
it's all true, right?
573
00:29:34,400 --> 00:29:37,000
Okay, fine. Then come
back and tell them.
574
00:29:37,100 --> 00:29:39,200
But you gotta come back here.
575
00:29:39,300 --> 00:29:42,700
And they'll understand.
Listen, Kimmel loves kids.
576
00:29:43,400 --> 00:29:44,700
So do I.
577
00:29:59,500 --> 00:30:02,500
Shhh.
578
00:30:03,200 --> 00:30:07,000
Hey, remember when we did that
drill down the fire escape?
579
00:30:10,400 --> 00:30:12,400
You wanna do it again?
580
00:30:14,400 --> 00:30:15,900
Okay.
581
00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:18,200
You gotta trust me, buddy.
582
00:30:19,300 --> 00:30:21,400
Oh, yeah, I got a nice bed
for you back here, Ez, huh?
583
00:30:21,400 --> 00:30:23,500
You got your Star Wars
pillow. I got snacks.
584
00:30:23,600 --> 00:30:25,500
This is gonna be fun!
585
00:30:25,600 --> 00:30:28,500
Hey. What are you doing?
What are you doing?
586
00:30:28,600 --> 00:30:30,300
Don't worry about it.
Go back in the house.
587
00:30:30,400 --> 00:30:32,200
- What do you mean?
- Don't worry about it.
588
00:30:32,300 --> 00:30:33,600
You're not taking the car.
589
00:30:34,000 --> 00:30:35,800
- Just having a little father-son time.
- You're not taking the car.
590
00:30:35,900 --> 00:30:38,000
- It's a Thrilla in Manila!
- We're not fighting, Ezra.
591
00:30:38,100 --> 00:30:39,400
We're not fighting,
just talking.
592
00:30:39,400 --> 00:30:41,300
Frazier whipping the mighty Ali!
593
00:30:41,400 --> 00:30:43,800
There's a court order out for you.
Are you crazy? What are you doing?
594
00:30:43,800 --> 00:30:46,300
Down goes Frazier!
Down goes Frazier!
595
00:30:46,400 --> 00:30:47,600
I gotta get him to bed.
596
00:30:47,700 --> 00:30:50,400
Get in the car, Ezra.
Hey, listen to me, okay?
597
00:30:50,500 --> 00:30:52,800
I saw him at that school,
I saw him on those drugs.
598
00:30:52,900 --> 00:30:54,900
They were killing him. I need
to get him away from here.
599
00:30:54,900 --> 00:30:57,100
You're doing it wrong. What the
hell is the matter with you?
600
00:30:57,200 --> 00:30:58,800
Pop, I swear to God,
stop, okay? Just stop.
601
00:30:58,800 --> 00:31:00,900
You told me to fight, I'm
fighting. Let's get in the car, Ez.
602
00:31:00,900 --> 00:31:03,000
You're not fighting, you're
running! What are you doing?
603
00:31:03,100 --> 00:31:04,600
I'm not running.
Ezra, get in the car!
604
00:31:04,700 --> 00:31:06,000
Okay. It's okay.
605
00:31:06,100 --> 00:31:07,400
- I got some waffles for you.
- No.
606
00:31:07,400 --> 00:31:09,400
There's no waffles.
Ez, get in the car.
607
00:31:09,500 --> 00:31:12,000
- You want fresh whipped cream?
- Stop it, please.
608
00:31:12,100 --> 00:31:14,500
Listen, we're family. We're
the Rice Krispie boys.
609
00:31:14,600 --> 00:31:16,600
He's Snap, you're
Crackle, and who am I?
610
00:31:16,700 --> 00:31:18,000
- Pop-Pop!
- That's right!
611
00:31:18,100 --> 00:31:19,900
And we're not fighting,
we're just sparring.
612
00:31:20,000 --> 00:31:21,000
So show me what you got.
613
00:31:21,100 --> 00:31:22,800
That's it! And, and...
614
00:31:22,900 --> 00:31:25,800
- Oh!
- All right! Knock out!
615
00:31:25,900 --> 00:31:27,100
Good job. Come on, buddy.
616
00:31:27,200 --> 00:31:28,700
In the car. Come on. Let's go.
617
00:31:28,800 --> 00:31:31,600
- This is a mistake.
- Let's go. Okay. Says who?
618
00:31:31,900 --> 00:31:34,400
- Can Pop-Pop come?
- No, Pop-Pop can't come.
619
00:31:34,500 --> 00:31:36,400
Pop-Pop's gonna hold the
fort down. Right, Pop-Pop?
620
00:31:36,400 --> 00:31:38,700
- Where are you taking him?
- I'm going to Nick's in Michigan.
621
00:31:38,700 --> 00:31:41,000
Oh, Jesus. That Greek prick.
Of all the fucking people...
622
00:31:41,100 --> 00:31:42,700
Stop it. He's my best friend.
623
00:31:42,800 --> 00:31:43,900
That guy's a fucking thief!
624
00:31:44,000 --> 00:31:45,800
I take him into my
house, he steals from me.
625
00:31:45,900 --> 00:31:47,500
He didn't steal your saucepan.
626
00:31:47,600 --> 00:31:50,000
I'm not stealing your clothes.
Nobody's stealing anything, okay?
627
00:31:50,000 --> 00:31:52,300
You're making a mistake.
You can't do this.
628
00:31:52,400 --> 00:31:54,800
You know what? Take this, please.
Already have enough problems.
629
00:31:54,800 --> 00:31:56,200
- Thank you!
- This is crazy!
630
00:31:56,300 --> 00:31:57,900
- Say, "Bye, Pop-Pop!"
- Bye, Pop-Pop!
631
00:31:58,000 --> 00:31:59,500
Bye, Pop-Pop!
632
00:32:17,700 --> 00:32:19,800
What the fuck am I doing?
633
00:32:23,500 --> 00:32:25,800
♪ Sisyphus peered
Into the mist ♪
634
00:32:25,900 --> 00:32:29,600
♪ A stone's throw From
the precipice, paused ♪
635
00:32:31,100 --> 00:32:32,500
♪ Did he jump or did he fall
636
00:32:32,600 --> 00:32:35,300
♪ As he gazed into the
maw Of the morning mist? ♪
637
00:32:35,400 --> 00:32:37,900
♪ Did he raise both fists
And say "To hell with this" ♪
638
00:32:38,000 --> 00:32:40,800
♪ And just let the rock roll?
639
00:32:43,200 --> 00:32:44,900
♪ Let it roll
640
00:32:45,100 --> 00:32:48,300
♪ Let it crash down low
641
00:32:48,400 --> 00:32:52,500
♪ There's a house down there
But I lost it long ago ♪
642
00:32:54,000 --> 00:32:57,300
Ezzie? Ezzie?
643
00:32:57,400 --> 00:32:58,600
Ezzie?
644
00:32:58,700 --> 00:33:00,200
Ezra?
645
00:33:00,300 --> 00:33:04,500
♪ See my house down there
But I lost it long ago ♪
646
00:33:04,600 --> 00:33:05,800
Ezzie?
647
00:33:06,500 --> 00:33:08,800
Ezra? Ezra!
648
00:33:21,400 --> 00:33:24,300
- Did you get a good night's sleep?
- No.
649
00:33:26,500 --> 00:33:28,100
I bet it's Mom.
650
00:33:28,200 --> 00:33:29,700
I bet you're right. Ugh.
651
00:33:29,800 --> 00:33:32,400
Parental abduction is defined
as one parent taking a child
652
00:33:32,500 --> 00:33:35,400
without permission
from the other parent.
653
00:33:35,400 --> 00:33:38,200
- Yeah.
- You kidnapped Ezra?
654
00:33:38,300 --> 00:33:40,300
I can't be kidnapping
if I'm his father.
655
00:33:40,500 --> 00:33:42,200
Of course it can! You
have a restraining order!
656
00:33:42,200 --> 00:33:43,400
I'm saving my son's life.
657
00:33:43,500 --> 00:33:45,300
Ezzie needs somebody
to advocate for him
658
00:33:45,400 --> 00:33:47,300
the way you and I
used to dotogether.
659
00:33:47,400 --> 00:33:48,700
You know I'm right.
660
00:33:48,800 --> 00:33:51,800
No! No, you're not right,
Max. You are wrong, okay?
661
00:33:51,900 --> 00:33:54,300
You need to bring him home now!
662
00:33:56,200 --> 00:33:58,000
- Is that Ezra?
- Hey, hey, hey, hey!
663
00:33:58,100 --> 00:33:59,400
- Let go!
- No bananas!
664
00:33:59,500 --> 00:34:01,500
- No bananas!
- No bananas!
665
00:34:01,600 --> 00:34:03,100
- Get his inhaler!
- Excuse me!
666
00:34:03,200 --> 00:34:04,600
Okay, Ezzie. It's
all right, breathe.
667
00:34:04,600 --> 00:34:07,400
Breathe! Breathe. Breathe.
Breathe, all right.
668
00:34:07,500 --> 00:34:09,800
I got you. It's okay.
Come on. Come on, come on.
669
00:34:09,900 --> 00:34:11,600
Where's the bathroom?
Where's the bathroom?
670
00:34:11,600 --> 00:34:14,100
Come on. You're okay.
671
00:34:17,500 --> 00:34:18,600
He's all right.
672
00:34:18,700 --> 00:34:20,400
Look, I didn't know
that there were
673
00:34:20,500 --> 00:34:22,900
bananas in the oatmeal, right?
674
00:34:23,000 --> 00:34:25,500
- What you're doing is insane!
- Nah, I don't think it is.
675
00:34:25,600 --> 00:34:27,700
That's the problem.
You're not thinking.
676
00:34:27,800 --> 00:34:29,500
Trust me, this is very,
677
00:34:29,600 --> 00:34:30,800
very, very bad.
678
00:34:30,900 --> 00:34:32,100
In fact, this is a crime.
679
00:34:32,200 --> 00:34:33,900
Bring him back!
680
00:34:35,300 --> 00:34:37,200
Max?
681
00:34:37,600 --> 00:34:40,200
Holy shit! He hung
up on me again!
682
00:34:41,500 --> 00:34:42,600
Fuck!
683
00:34:44,200 --> 00:34:46,800
You know, you can
call the police.
684
00:34:48,700 --> 00:34:50,900
No, I'm not... I'm not
gonna make this worse.
685
00:34:51,000 --> 00:34:53,300
I'm not traumatizing my son.
686
00:35:12,700 --> 00:35:15,800
Hey, buddy, what's the
deal with the bananas?
687
00:35:18,000 --> 00:35:21,300
- Hmm?
- I start gagging, and I can't breathe.
688
00:35:22,000 --> 00:35:24,400
Well, okay, but we know that you're
not allergic to bananas, right?
689
00:35:24,400 --> 00:35:26,500
Because we saw that
doctor, remember?
690
00:35:26,600 --> 00:35:30,100
So, maybe the banana thing's
in your mind, you know?
691
00:35:35,700 --> 00:35:39,600
I'm growling and I'm
mooing, what am I?
692
00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:43,100
I got no idea, but you're freakin'
me out there with no shirt on.
693
00:35:43,200 --> 00:35:45,200
Mad cow disease!
694
00:35:45,300 --> 00:35:48,000
Oh, is that original material?
695
00:35:48,100 --> 00:35:49,500
- SpongeBob.
- Ah, I see.
696
00:35:49,600 --> 00:35:51,800
That's why it wasn't funny.
697
00:36:04,400 --> 00:36:06,500
Are you going to prison?
698
00:36:08,900 --> 00:36:12,300
Look, Ez, Dad made a big
decision when I was upset,
699
00:36:12,300 --> 00:36:13,800
and that's never a good idea.
700
00:36:13,900 --> 00:36:15,300
"Bang, bang, bitches.
701
00:36:15,400 --> 00:36:18,100
I'll cut off his head and
feed him to the fishes!"
702
00:36:18,200 --> 00:36:21,200
Okay. Maybe no
more Breaking Bad.
703
00:36:21,300 --> 00:36:23,400
Mom might be right
about that one.
704
00:36:23,400 --> 00:36:25,900
Bruce wants to kill
you. You can't go home.
705
00:36:26,000 --> 00:36:29,700
- Okay, he's definitely not a fan...
- No! That's what he said!
706
00:36:29,800 --> 00:36:30,900
What?
707
00:36:32,100 --> 00:36:34,200
- When?
- When I got hit by the cab.
708
00:36:34,300 --> 00:36:37,700
I was coming to Pop-Pop's
to warn you about Bruce.
709
00:36:38,300 --> 00:36:40,700
Okay, hold that thought, buddy.
710
00:36:46,300 --> 00:36:48,200
Are you telling me
711
00:36:48,300 --> 00:36:51,500
that you didn't run into
the street on purpose?
712
00:36:51,700 --> 00:36:53,400
Ezzie?
713
00:36:53,500 --> 00:36:55,100
Ezzie, I need your eyes, okay?
714
00:36:55,200 --> 00:36:57,200
This is very important.
715
00:36:58,000 --> 00:37:01,200
Are you saying that you didn't
run into the street on purpose?
716
00:37:01,300 --> 00:37:03,900
Am I nuts? A dog
tried to bite me.
717
00:37:06,000 --> 00:37:08,000
Did you tell Mom this?
718
00:37:10,500 --> 00:37:12,900
- Don't be mad.
- Nobody's mad.
719
00:37:12,900 --> 00:37:14,500
- There was...
- I wasn't supposed to tell you?
720
00:37:14,500 --> 00:37:16,000
Yes, of course. Hey.
721
00:37:16,100 --> 00:37:18,700
Telling the truth, that's
your biggest superpower.
722
00:37:18,800 --> 00:37:19,900
Huh?
723
00:37:20,300 --> 00:37:22,300
Thanks for telling me.
724
00:37:22,900 --> 00:37:24,500
You know what?
725
00:37:24,700 --> 00:37:25,800
You know what?
726
00:37:25,900 --> 00:37:27,100
I think we gotta dance.
727
00:37:27,200 --> 00:37:28,700
I think we gotta dance.
728
00:37:29,100 --> 00:37:31,700
Come on. Let's find
a good station.
729
00:37:31,700 --> 00:37:33,900
Ah! There it is. Ah. Can
you move your butt muscles?
730
00:37:34,000 --> 00:37:36,500
Come on. Let's go. Move
it up. Into your chest.
731
00:37:36,600 --> 00:37:39,600
Into your shoulders.
Ah, yeah! Let it roll.
732
00:37:39,600 --> 00:37:42,300
Let it roll. Down to the ass.
Back up to the shoulders.
733
00:37:42,400 --> 00:37:45,900
Now some pops. Some
claps. Huh? Elbows up.
734
00:37:46,000 --> 00:37:47,500
Ah, yeah, let it roll.
735
00:37:47,600 --> 00:37:49,400
Let it roll. Come on. Up
into your chest, dude.
736
00:37:49,400 --> 00:37:50,800
Into your chest, Ezzie.
737
00:37:50,900 --> 00:37:53,500
Yeah, yeah, that's it.
Let it roll. Let it roll.
738
00:37:53,600 --> 00:37:55,800
♪ Express yourself
739
00:38:01,300 --> 00:38:03,200
I need to rinse!
740
00:38:03,300 --> 00:38:05,300
Coming.
741
00:38:09,400 --> 00:38:10,400
Hey, Jayne.
742
00:38:10,500 --> 00:38:12,500
- Where the hell are you?
- Uh,
743
00:38:12,600 --> 00:38:14,200
I'm just taking a
little time off with Ez.
744
00:38:14,200 --> 00:38:16,700
Not a good time
to take off, Max.
745
00:38:16,800 --> 00:38:19,300
Yeah. I... I know. I
know. I... I screwed up.
746
00:38:19,400 --> 00:38:21,000
Yes, you did, and
they were pissed!
747
00:38:21,100 --> 00:38:23,600
Yeah, look, I had a bad
night. It happens, right?
748
00:38:23,700 --> 00:38:26,800
No.[scoffs] Sal Argento
had a bad night.
749
00:38:26,900 --> 00:38:29,400
Yeah. I guess that's
something, right?
750
00:38:29,500 --> 00:38:31,600
No, what's something
is having a manager
751
00:38:31,700 --> 00:38:34,100
who gets Jimmy Kimmel
to watch the video.
752
00:38:34,200 --> 00:38:35,800
Video?
753
00:38:35,900 --> 00:38:37,300
What... what video?
754
00:38:37,400 --> 00:38:39,300
The one I made with my phone!
755
00:38:39,400 --> 00:38:41,400
He wants to book you.
756
00:38:41,500 --> 00:38:43,700
- What?
- I need to rinse!
757
00:38:43,700 --> 00:38:45,800
So you have to get
yourself to LA.
758
00:38:45,900 --> 00:38:48,200
They're not gonna fly you.
Is that gonna be a problem?
759
00:38:48,300 --> 00:38:49,800
Uh, no.
760
00:38:50,100 --> 00:38:52,400
- Uh, when?
- Next Friday,
761
00:38:52,500 --> 00:38:54,300
4:00 pm in the Kimmel studio.
762
00:38:54,400 --> 00:38:56,200
Rinse!
763
00:38:56,300 --> 00:38:58,900
Okay. All right.
I'm coming. Uh...
764
00:38:59,000 --> 00:39:01,200
- He loved you, Max.
- He loved me, really?
765
00:39:01,300 --> 00:39:02,500
I love you, Jayne.
766
00:39:02,600 --> 00:39:04,700
You're full of shit. Bye.
767
00:39:04,800 --> 00:39:05,700
Rinse!
768
00:39:05,800 --> 00:39:08,400
Okay. I'm coming.
I'm coming. Hey, ow!
769
00:39:08,500 --> 00:39:10,800
Shit! That's boiling
hot! Come on, get out!
770
00:39:10,900 --> 00:39:13,000
Get out! Get out!
Get out! Come on.
771
00:39:13,100 --> 00:39:15,100
What... what are you doing? Why...
don't you feel it? It's hot!
772
00:39:15,200 --> 00:39:17,800
- I don't... I don't feel hot!
- Okay, it's hot, though.
773
00:39:17,900 --> 00:39:19,600
Okay? Look at your
arms. They're all red!
774
00:39:19,700 --> 00:39:21,700
Mom checks the temperature!
775
00:39:21,800 --> 00:39:25,000
That's fine, but if you see steam,
it means it's too hot, okay?
776
00:39:25,100 --> 00:39:26,700
- God damn it!
- My stupid brain.
777
00:39:26,800 --> 00:39:28,900
- Stop, no. Hey, come on. Sit down.
- Stupid! Stupid!
778
00:39:29,000 --> 00:39:30,800
- Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!
- Stop that, okay?
779
00:39:30,900 --> 00:39:33,100
You're not stupid! You're
not... stop hitting yourself.
780
00:39:33,200 --> 00:39:35,600
Hey, hey, hey, listen to me.
Hey, hey. You're not stupid.
781
00:39:35,700 --> 00:39:37,200
You're not stupid.
You're smart, okay?
782
00:39:37,200 --> 00:39:41,000
If you see steam, it means
it's too hot. Easy-peasy, okay?
783
00:39:42,600 --> 00:39:45,100
It's on the cards.
784
00:39:45,200 --> 00:39:47,700
We don't have the fucking cards!
785
00:39:48,400 --> 00:39:49,900
I'm sorry.
786
00:39:50,500 --> 00:39:52,700
- Mom uses Bactine.
- Oh, yeah? Well, guess what.
787
00:39:52,800 --> 00:39:54,700
We don't have
Bactine, so you and I,
788
00:39:54,800 --> 00:39:56,900
we're gonna have to figure
it out together, all right?
789
00:39:57,000 --> 00:39:59,500
There we go. Nice.
790
00:39:59,600 --> 00:40:00,700
You know what? I
got a better idea.
791
00:40:00,800 --> 00:40:02,700
I got a better
idea. Let go. Here.
792
00:40:03,000 --> 00:40:06,500
Ready? Come on. Stand
up. Stand up. Arms up.
793
00:40:07,100 --> 00:40:09,600
Huh? Armpits. Isn't this fun?
794
00:40:09,700 --> 00:40:12,400
Huh? Does Mom do
stuff like this? No?
795
00:40:12,500 --> 00:40:14,200
I didn't think so. Okay.
796
00:40:14,300 --> 00:40:15,800
We got this!
797
00:40:16,600 --> 00:40:18,600
Why do you always yell?
798
00:40:19,800 --> 00:40:22,300
Because Pop-Pop used
to lock me in the attic
799
00:40:22,400 --> 00:40:23,500
chained to a radiator.
800
00:40:23,600 --> 00:40:25,800
I had to yell so he'd
remember to feed me.
801
00:40:25,900 --> 00:40:28,400
There are no
radiators in attics.
802
00:40:28,700 --> 00:40:31,400
You are good. Nothing
gets past you.
803
00:40:32,700 --> 00:40:33,900
Boom. There you go.
804
00:40:34,000 --> 00:40:35,900
I want to talk to
you about something.
805
00:40:36,000 --> 00:40:38,900
I just got off the
phone with Aunt Jayne.
806
00:40:39,600 --> 00:40:43,300
Turns out Jimmy Kimmel wants me
to be on his show in Los Angeles.
807
00:40:43,400 --> 00:40:44,800
That's far.
808
00:40:45,300 --> 00:40:47,000
Yeah, it is far.
809
00:40:47,600 --> 00:40:51,800
Did you get the part about Jimmy Kimmel
wanting me to be a guest on his show?
810
00:40:51,900 --> 00:40:53,100
Yeah?
811
00:40:53,200 --> 00:40:55,200
So, you got anything for me?
812
00:40:55,300 --> 00:40:57,400
Any advice for your dad?
813
00:40:58,800 --> 00:40:59,900
Be polite.
814
00:41:00,000 --> 00:41:01,500
"Be polite."
815
00:41:02,400 --> 00:41:04,000
Anything else?
816
00:41:04,700 --> 00:41:07,500
- Nope. Now stop asking me.
- Okay.
817
00:41:08,900 --> 00:41:10,400
But where am I gonna
get my mojo from?
818
00:41:10,400 --> 00:41:13,500
- Mojo man!
- That's right.
819
00:41:13,600 --> 00:41:15,400
Good. Okay.
820
00:41:15,800 --> 00:41:17,300
Let's have a staring contest.
821
00:41:17,400 --> 00:41:19,100
- I don't want to.
- Come on.
822
00:41:19,200 --> 00:41:21,200
- For me? Please.
- No.
823
00:41:21,500 --> 00:41:23,000
- Pretty please?
- No.
824
00:41:23,400 --> 00:41:26,000
What if I make it
worth your while?
825
00:41:27,400 --> 00:41:30,900
If I win, we go trick-or-treat?
826
00:41:32,100 --> 00:41:33,500
Yeah, deal.
827
00:41:34,000 --> 00:41:36,800
Ready? Come on. First
one that blinks loses.
828
00:41:36,900 --> 00:41:39,100
Go, one, two,
829
00:41:39,200 --> 00:41:40,800
three, four...
830
00:41:40,900 --> 00:41:43,500
- Are you autistic?
- Five, six...
831
00:41:43,900 --> 00:41:45,500
- seven...
- Mom says you are.
832
00:41:45,600 --> 00:41:48,300
Eight... Mom thinks
everyone's autistic...
833
00:41:48,400 --> 00:41:50,600
- nine, ten...
- She thinks you got it from Pop-Pop,
834
00:41:50,700 --> 00:41:52,200
who gave it to you,
who gave it to me.
835
00:41:52,300 --> 00:41:54,800
Listen to me. Nobody knows
for sure, okay, honey?
836
00:41:54,900 --> 00:41:56,100
Nobody.
837
00:41:56,200 --> 00:41:58,100
But it doesn't matter
'cause you're awesome.
838
00:41:58,200 --> 00:41:59,600
Fourteen, 15, 16...
839
00:41:59,700 --> 00:42:02,200
- Does Mom love me?
- Seventeen.
840
00:42:03,000 --> 00:42:05,900
Buddy, Mom loves you more
than anything in the world.
841
00:42:06,000 --> 00:42:07,200
Yeah. Okay?
842
00:42:07,300 --> 00:42:09,100
She and I, we're just having
a disagreement right now.
843
00:42:09,200 --> 00:42:13,100
- You blinked! I win!
- Uh! Oh, you did so good.
844
00:42:13,200 --> 00:42:15,400
You did so good. You win.
845
00:42:15,500 --> 00:42:17,500
Good job, buddy.
846
00:42:17,600 --> 00:42:21,000
Let's go. Bring it.
Yeah, baby! Whoo!
847
00:42:22,700 --> 00:42:25,100
Stan, can you open up, please!
848
00:42:25,500 --> 00:42:26,600
Stan!
849
00:42:27,900 --> 00:42:30,700
We need to talk!
850
00:42:30,800 --> 00:42:32,400
Stan?
851
00:42:32,500 --> 00:42:34,000
Hey, I know you're in there!
852
00:42:34,100 --> 00:42:35,900
Open the door!
853
00:42:36,600 --> 00:42:38,200
Open the door!
854
00:42:41,000 --> 00:42:43,600
Stan, just talk to me, please?
855
00:42:44,200 --> 00:42:46,300
I'm worried about them.
856
00:42:49,100 --> 00:42:50,300
Please?
857
00:43:00,100 --> 00:43:01,200
You don't give a shit!
858
00:43:01,800 --> 00:43:02,900
Huh?
859
00:43:02,900 --> 00:43:05,100
You're going to let Max
ruin his life again!
860
00:43:05,200 --> 00:43:07,700
And your boys too!
861
00:43:08,700 --> 00:43:10,500
Jerk!
862
00:43:27,800 --> 00:43:30,800
♪ Watching a stretch of road
863
00:43:32,100 --> 00:43:35,300
♪ Miles of light explode
864
00:43:36,600 --> 00:43:39,500
♪ Drifting off a thing
865
00:43:40,100 --> 00:43:43,000
♪ I'd never done before ♪
866
00:43:44,900 --> 00:43:48,100
♪ Watching a crowd roll in
867
00:43:49,400 --> 00:43:52,700
♪ Out go the lights it begins
868
00:43:54,600 --> 00:43:57,000
Hey! There they are!
869
00:43:57,600 --> 00:43:58,600
- Hey!
- Hey!
870
00:43:58,700 --> 00:44:00,700
Hello, baby!
871
00:44:00,800 --> 00:44:04,500
Ezzie, get on out here and
give your Uncle Nicky a hug!
872
00:44:04,600 --> 00:44:07,900
Oh, come on, come here! Hey, where
you going, kid? Oh, I got you.
873
00:44:08,000 --> 00:44:11,800
Oh, that's it. That's it! You
are dead. You're so dead! Oh!
874
00:44:12,600 --> 00:44:15,000
Hi! I'm Margaret.
875
00:44:15,100 --> 00:44:16,600
How are you?
876
00:44:17,500 --> 00:44:19,800
Wanna help me set the table?
877
00:44:20,900 --> 00:44:22,300
Come on.
878
00:44:22,900 --> 00:44:26,400
- Oh, you're...
- Oh! Look at you!
879
00:44:26,500 --> 00:44:29,500
No chance! Jesus
Christ, man. Huh?
880
00:44:29,600 --> 00:44:32,500
Bottomless s'mores
when you run a camp.
881
00:44:32,600 --> 00:44:34,600
- Endless s'mores.
- Can you get that?
882
00:44:34,700 --> 00:44:36,000
- I'm not gonna carry anything.
- Okay.
883
00:44:36,000 --> 00:44:37,800
What's up with the, uh...
the bad habit there?
884
00:44:37,800 --> 00:44:39,800
That's Sister
Margaret from Senegal.
885
00:44:39,900 --> 00:44:41,700
Oh. That's way outta town.
886
00:44:41,800 --> 00:44:44,300
Yeah, she's, uh, staying
with a family in Ann Arbor.
887
00:44:44,400 --> 00:44:45,700
She goes to Michigan.
888
00:44:45,900 --> 00:44:48,200
You know that they want nuns
to have a bachelor's degree?
889
00:44:48,300 --> 00:44:51,300
- Why the fuck would I know that?
- I mean, can you imagine that?
890
00:44:51,400 --> 00:44:54,000
Four years of college before
you can say your vows.
891
00:44:54,100 --> 00:44:55,800
But as long as
she's on my staff,
892
00:44:55,900 --> 00:44:57,800
Catholic church pays
half my expenses.
893
00:44:57,900 --> 00:45:00,200
Huh. Scammin' the
Vatican. I'm proud of you.
894
00:45:00,300 --> 00:45:02,200
- Yeah, huh.
- There's no cheese on it.
895
00:45:02,300 --> 00:45:04,600
Wait 'til you try
it. It's incredible.
896
00:45:04,700 --> 00:45:06,500
She uses ancient
Senegalese spices.
897
00:45:06,600 --> 00:45:07,700
I got the spice from Costco.
898
00:45:07,800 --> 00:45:09,700
- Whoa!
- Costco.
899
00:45:09,800 --> 00:45:12,400
That sounds exotic! Costco.
900
00:45:12,500 --> 00:45:14,400
I thought you brought
it from Senegal.
901
00:45:14,500 --> 00:45:16,500
No. You're mixing
up the cheeses.
902
00:45:16,600 --> 00:45:19,000
And she puts goat... she
puts goat in the lasagna.
903
00:45:19,100 --> 00:45:22,200
- What's wrong?
- Metal hurts my teeth.
904
00:45:23,200 --> 00:45:26,600
Okay, but you know, plastic
hurts the planet. So...
905
00:45:26,700 --> 00:45:29,000
Oh, I got some plastic right in
the store room, I can just...
906
00:45:29,000 --> 00:45:30,800
No, no. We're okay.
We're gonna use the fork.
907
00:45:30,800 --> 00:45:31,900
It's okay...
908
00:45:32,000 --> 00:45:33,000
It's mind over matter
like the bananas.
909
00:45:33,000 --> 00:45:35,000
Come on, Ezzie, try it.
910
00:45:35,800 --> 00:45:37,000
Ezzie.
911
00:45:37,000 --> 00:45:38,800
E... Ez, come on.
That's not polite.
912
00:45:38,900 --> 00:45:40,900
Pick up the fork
and try it please.
913
00:45:41,000 --> 00:45:43,100
- Ez?
- I... I need plastic.
914
00:45:43,200 --> 00:45:45,900
- Mom has plastic!
- Okay. Well, Mom's not here.
915
00:45:46,000 --> 00:45:48,100
Ezra. Where you going?
916
00:45:48,600 --> 00:45:51,200
- Ezra?
- I need plastic!
917
00:45:51,300 --> 00:45:53,700
- You don't listen to me!
- Sorry, guys.
918
00:45:53,800 --> 00:45:55,600
Ez, come on. Come
on back, please.
919
00:45:55,700 --> 00:45:57,200
It hurts me!
920
00:45:57,200 --> 00:45:59,000
- Because they're razor sharp!
- Ezzie! Ezzie!
921
00:45:59,100 --> 00:46:00,800
- It's not in my mind!
- Ezzie!
922
00:46:00,900 --> 00:46:03,200
- Ezra, come and sit down!
- I'm not taking it!
923
00:46:03,300 --> 00:46:04,800
I'll make you a deal. I'll
let you eat with your fingers
924
00:46:04,800 --> 00:46:06,600
if you try a fork once.
925
00:46:06,700 --> 00:46:09,500
- It hurts! It hurts!
- Once, Ezra.
926
00:46:10,800 --> 00:46:12,000
I would take that deal.
927
00:46:12,100 --> 00:46:14,600
- I need plastic!
- Sounds like a good deal.
928
00:46:14,700 --> 00:46:16,700
Plus, I'm gonna use
my fingers, too.
929
00:46:16,800 --> 00:46:18,200
So will I.
930
00:46:20,300 --> 00:46:21,800
Once, Ezzie?
931
00:46:23,600 --> 00:46:24,900
Deal?
932
00:46:26,700 --> 00:46:30,200
Okay! Let's do it!
Let's get to work!
933
00:46:30,300 --> 00:46:31,700
All right!
934
00:46:32,100 --> 00:46:34,400
Come on, Max. Join the party.
935
00:46:35,000 --> 00:46:37,600
Join the lasagna
party. Now... oh, God.
936
00:46:37,700 --> 00:46:39,300
- Oh, man. Of course.
- Oh, my!
937
00:46:39,400 --> 00:46:42,300
"They each shouldered the
heavy pack and the water skin
938
00:46:42,400 --> 00:46:43,700
which was their share,
939
00:46:43,800 --> 00:46:47,500
then turned from the light
that lay on the lands outside
940
00:46:47,500 --> 00:46:49,800
and plunged into the forest."
941
00:47:34,700 --> 00:47:36,400
You can go now.
942
00:47:41,400 --> 00:47:43,400
Ezzie, did you just...
943
00:47:46,800 --> 00:47:48,000
For me?
944
00:47:49,000 --> 00:47:50,600
You can go now.
945
00:47:51,300 --> 00:47:52,400
Okay?
946
00:47:53,700 --> 00:47:55,200
Goodbye.
947
00:47:58,300 --> 00:47:59,400
Okay.
948
00:48:16,600 --> 00:48:20,500
Max, oh, my goodness, I
have a crush on your son.
949
00:48:20,600 --> 00:48:21,900
Ah, he'll break your heart.
950
00:48:22,000 --> 00:48:23,500
Don't worry. I can take it.
951
00:48:23,700 --> 00:48:25,100
All right, but you know what?
952
00:48:25,200 --> 00:48:27,700
If there's no future, Sister,
let's not lead him on.
953
00:48:27,800 --> 00:48:30,000
Hey, hey. I haven't
taken my vows yet.
954
00:48:30,100 --> 00:48:32,600
- Oh!
- Uh-oh. [chuckles] Okay.
955
00:48:39,900 --> 00:48:41,300
Good night.
956
00:48:41,300 --> 00:48:42,900
- Good night.
- Smoking, huh?
957
00:48:43,100 --> 00:48:45,400
The wages of sin is death.
958
00:48:45,900 --> 00:48:47,900
Did she just bless you?
959
00:48:47,900 --> 00:48:49,700
She does it every
time she leaves.
960
00:48:49,800 --> 00:48:52,500
I think it's making
me a better man.
961
00:48:54,000 --> 00:48:58,600
Look, I... I don't want to be sacrilegious,
but I think this could be love.
962
00:48:58,800 --> 00:48:59,800
Hey.
963
00:48:59,800 --> 00:49:00,900
I'm Greek Orthodox,
964
00:49:01,000 --> 00:49:02,200
and we don't go there.
965
00:49:02,300 --> 00:49:03,900
Okay?
966
00:49:04,000 --> 00:49:06,300
And she, oh...
she's a holy spirit.
967
00:49:06,400 --> 00:49:08,800
- All right. Here you go.
- I'm just saying, man.
968
00:49:08,900 --> 00:49:11,800
House in the woods,
summer camp, hot nun.
969
00:49:12,900 --> 00:49:15,900
Yeah, it sure beats telling
dick jokes to drunken tourists.
970
00:49:16,000 --> 00:49:17,800
Hey, it's a living.
971
00:49:18,900 --> 00:49:20,600
It wasn't for me.
972
00:49:22,800 --> 00:49:24,100
So why are you here?
973
00:49:24,200 --> 00:49:25,800
What do you mean? I
needed a little Nicky.
974
00:49:27,100 --> 00:49:28,600
You got a little bit of Nicky,
975
00:49:28,900 --> 00:49:33,300
and, uh, Nicky's a
little concerned.
976
00:49:33,400 --> 00:49:35,700
You haven't signed the
papers yet, have you?
977
00:49:36,100 --> 00:49:38,000
Seriously?
978
00:49:41,200 --> 00:49:44,000
- That's it. You blew my high.
- Are you gonna cry?
979
00:49:44,100 --> 00:49:45,900
Do you wanna cry?
You wanna let it go?
980
00:49:46,000 --> 00:49:48,200
Come to Papa Bear. Come on.
981
00:49:48,400 --> 00:49:50,300
I tried to give her
everything, Nick.
982
00:49:50,400 --> 00:49:52,600
But where would she put it?
983
00:49:54,300 --> 00:49:56,800
- God bless Steven Wright.
- Ah.
984
00:49:56,900 --> 00:49:59,200
"All those who believe
in psychokinesis
985
00:49:59,300 --> 00:50:02,700
- raise my hand."
- "Raise my hand."
986
00:50:02,800 --> 00:50:05,500
I broke into Jenna's house
in the middle of the night,
987
00:50:05,600 --> 00:50:07,500
and I kidnapped Ezra.
988
00:50:10,700 --> 00:50:12,100
All right, I'll play along.
989
00:50:12,200 --> 00:50:14,700
Why did you break into
Jenna's house and kidnap Ezra?
990
00:50:14,800 --> 00:50:17,700
Ezzie snuck out of Jenna's
and got hit by a cab.
991
00:50:17,800 --> 00:50:18,900
What?
992
00:50:19,200 --> 00:50:21,500
His doctor said he might've
done it on purpose.
993
00:50:21,600 --> 00:50:22,600
Shit!
994
00:50:22,600 --> 00:50:24,500
You think that was true?
995
00:50:24,600 --> 00:50:27,300
No! Wha... you kidding me?
996
00:50:27,400 --> 00:50:30,500
Every day he wakes up,
that kid chooses life.
997
00:50:30,800 --> 00:50:32,100
Oh, good.
998
00:50:33,200 --> 00:50:35,200
That's good.
999
00:50:35,600 --> 00:50:37,400
So why'd you do it?
1000
00:50:37,600 --> 00:50:40,000
Jenna thinks he should go to a
special needs school, and I don't.
1001
00:50:40,000 --> 00:50:42,100
- Why not?
- Because in public school,
1002
00:50:42,200 --> 00:50:44,800
you know, he'll learn how to fight,
learn how to protect himself.
1003
00:50:44,900 --> 00:50:46,100
What are you, the great Santini?
1004
00:50:46,200 --> 00:50:47,900
What are you... what
are you talking about?
1005
00:50:47,900 --> 00:50:50,100
I see people move
away from Ez, right?
1006
00:50:50,500 --> 00:50:53,100
He has a temper tantrum or he's
just walking down the street.
1007
00:50:53,200 --> 00:50:57,000
You know, people aren't trying to
be mean, it's just that it's easier.
1008
00:50:57,100 --> 00:50:59,200
You know the word "autism"
comes from the Greek
1009
00:50:59,300 --> 00:51:00,600
"in your own world."
1010
00:51:00,700 --> 00:51:03,800
I don't want him in his
own world, Nick. I...
1011
00:51:08,300 --> 00:51:10,400
I want him in this world.
1012
00:51:21,700 --> 00:51:23,000
You make it back okay?
1013
00:51:23,300 --> 00:51:24,700
Put Max on the phone.
1014
00:51:24,800 --> 00:51:27,100
Oh, my God.
1015
00:51:27,200 --> 00:51:29,000
I don't have your pan.
1016
00:51:29,100 --> 00:51:30,600
Hello.
1017
00:51:33,100 --> 00:51:35,100
- Hello?
- Yeah, I'm right here, Pop.
1018
00:51:35,200 --> 00:51:36,900
What do you think, the
world stopped for you
1019
00:51:36,900 --> 00:51:39,100
- to hang out with this idiot?
- What are you talking about?
1020
00:51:39,100 --> 00:51:41,100
She took my son and
I took him back!
1021
00:51:41,200 --> 00:51:43,200
You made a promise, you
didn't keep your promise.
1022
00:51:43,300 --> 00:51:45,200
She's throwing rocks
at my window now.
1023
00:51:45,300 --> 00:51:46,800
- Hang up the phone.
- Hello?
1024
00:51:46,900 --> 00:51:48,400
I'm coming there tomorrow!
1025
00:51:48,500 --> 00:51:49,900
- No!
- Then listen to me carefully.
1026
00:51:50,000 --> 00:51:51,900
Call Ezzie's mom.
1027
00:51:52,000 --> 00:51:56,100
- You hear me? Call Ezzie's mom.
- I don't have your pan.
1028
00:52:01,300 --> 00:52:03,400
- Where are you?
- Uh, don't worry about it.
1029
00:52:03,500 --> 00:52:06,500
- Where are you? Where are you?
- You know, Jen, I gotta say,
1030
00:52:06,600 --> 00:52:08,900
in spite of everything
that we've been through,
1031
00:52:09,000 --> 00:52:11,200
I... I really believed you when
you said that no matter what,
1032
00:52:11,200 --> 00:52:13,100
we were gonna treat
each other like family,
1033
00:52:13,200 --> 00:52:14,700
and we were gonna be
honest with each other.
1034
00:52:14,700 --> 00:52:16,800
- Remember you said that?
- You haven't been honest, Max.
1035
00:52:16,800 --> 00:52:19,500
You took him, and you
need to bring him home!
1036
00:52:19,600 --> 00:52:20,800
L-Let me ask you something.
1037
00:52:21,100 --> 00:52:22,800
Did Ezra tell you that the
reason he ran into the street
1038
00:52:22,800 --> 00:52:25,500
was because he thought he
was gonna get bit by a dog?
1039
00:52:25,600 --> 00:52:28,300
Yes, I mean, what
difference does it make?
1040
00:52:28,400 --> 00:52:31,300
He ran out of the house
in his pajamas, barefoot,
1041
00:52:31,400 --> 00:52:33,100
and he nearly got hit by a cab!
1042
00:52:33,200 --> 00:52:35,300
Yeah, because he heard your
boyfriend say he was gonna kill me.
1043
00:52:35,300 --> 00:52:36,700
Yeah, and he was
coming to warn me.
1044
00:52:36,800 --> 00:52:39,700
Okay, y... you're
scaring me now, Max.
1045
00:52:39,800 --> 00:52:42,600
I'm scaring you? Why don't
you ask your boyfriend?
1046
00:52:42,900 --> 00:52:44,200
You know Ezzie doesn't lie!
1047
00:52:44,300 --> 00:52:46,300
Okay. Hey, hey,
you... you're right.
1048
00:52:46,400 --> 00:52:48,700
You are family. You are.
1049
00:52:49,300 --> 00:52:52,500
But you need to just
bring him home now, okay?
1050
00:52:53,600 --> 00:52:56,000
Come home, and we'll
talk about all of this.
1051
00:52:56,400 --> 00:52:57,700
None of this is easy,
1052
00:52:57,800 --> 00:53:01,200
but all I ever wanted was
just to protect our boy.
1053
00:53:01,400 --> 00:53:03,000
Well, I'm protecting him now.
1054
00:53:03,100 --> 00:53:05,300
And leave my father alone.
1055
00:53:09,700 --> 00:53:13,100
You waited four days to
call about a missing child
1056
00:53:13,100 --> 00:53:14,900
taken by a man you're divorcing,
1057
00:53:15,000 --> 00:53:17,800
who has a restraining order
keeping him from seeing that child.
1058
00:53:17,900 --> 00:53:21,100
- Is that about right?
- I know how it sounds.
1059
00:53:21,400 --> 00:53:22,600
He's his father.
1060
00:53:22,700 --> 00:53:24,200
You don't think
he'd hurt your son?
1061
00:53:24,300 --> 00:53:25,900
No. No, no, absolutely not.
1062
00:53:26,300 --> 00:53:28,300
All right. Um, let's
make a few calls.
1063
00:53:28,400 --> 00:53:31,500
We'll see if we can find him,
and, um, put a trace on his phone.
1064
00:53:31,600 --> 00:53:33,400
No disrespect, Mike, but no.
1065
00:53:33,500 --> 00:53:37,100
I'm sorry, miss, but right now
I'm not feelin' good about this.
1066
00:53:37,200 --> 00:53:38,900
- You understand?
- Yeah, I understand.
1067
00:53:39,000 --> 00:53:42,700
Good, because from a missing
and exploited child perspective,
1068
00:53:42,800 --> 00:53:45,200
we need to issue
an Amber Alert now.
1069
00:53:45,300 --> 00:53:47,300
Are you sure this
situation warrants...
1070
00:53:47,400 --> 00:53:49,900
Margo, let's just start with
a missing person's report
1071
00:53:50,000 --> 00:53:52,100
Amber is for situations
exactly like this one.
1072
00:53:52,200 --> 00:53:53,900
And we're late, ma'am.
1073
00:53:54,000 --> 00:53:56,600
I'm afraid it's
not your decision.
1074
00:53:58,800 --> 00:54:00,800
You know how to do it?
1075
00:54:17,200 --> 00:54:20,700
Hey, that's nice. Thank you.
1076
00:54:21,100 --> 00:54:23,800
- Packed up and ready to go.
- Okay.
1077
00:54:26,500 --> 00:54:28,500
I don't think that kid's
ready to go, though.
1078
00:54:28,600 --> 00:54:30,000
- Hmm?
- You see him over there
1079
00:54:30,100 --> 00:54:32,400
- making lanyards with Sister Margaret?
- Yeah.
1080
00:54:32,500 --> 00:54:34,600
Kid's trying to steal my girl.
1081
00:54:34,700 --> 00:54:37,200
They look good together.
1082
00:54:37,300 --> 00:54:40,100
I think it's the
autism. Chicks dig it.
1083
00:54:40,700 --> 00:54:43,800
Sometimes I think I
might be on the spectrum.
1084
00:54:43,900 --> 00:54:45,300
I think you check
a lot of the boxes.
1085
00:54:45,400 --> 00:54:47,000
- Yeah.
- But, nah, I just think
1086
00:54:47,100 --> 00:54:48,900
you're a strange dude.
1087
00:54:49,000 --> 00:54:52,200
Yeah, I'm just uncomfortable
in social situations.
1088
00:54:52,300 --> 00:54:53,600
It's good you're out here.
1089
00:54:53,700 --> 00:54:56,900
- Yeah. Keeps me away from...
- Everyone.
1090
00:54:57,000 --> 00:54:59,600
- People.
- Yeah. Yeah.
1091
00:55:00,200 --> 00:55:02,600
You guys are welcome to stay.
1092
00:55:02,700 --> 00:55:06,000
Oh, buddy. I'd love to stay,
but we can't. I gotta be in LA.
1093
00:55:06,400 --> 00:55:07,900
What's in LA?
1094
00:55:09,900 --> 00:55:11,600
I booked Kimmel.
1095
00:55:13,500 --> 00:55:15,300
- Are you fucking kidding me?
- Yeah, it's not...
1096
00:55:15,400 --> 00:55:18,000
You wouldn't lead with
that? That's amazing!
1097
00:55:18,100 --> 00:55:20,200
- Yeah, it's okay.
- Max, come on!
1098
00:55:20,300 --> 00:55:21,900
- Kimmel, that's great!
- Yeah.
1099
00:55:22,000 --> 00:55:25,400
Best I did is get bumped from
Arsenio. Worst night of my life.
1100
00:55:25,600 --> 00:55:27,700
Hasselhoff segment ran long.
1101
00:55:27,800 --> 00:55:30,300
I'll tell you
what, you go to LA,
1102
00:55:30,400 --> 00:55:31,900
you work on your
set, you get relaxed,
1103
00:55:31,900 --> 00:55:34,100
you get focused, you get
centered, take care of yourself.
1104
00:55:34,100 --> 00:55:35,100
Leave Ezra with me.
1105
00:55:35,300 --> 00:55:36,300
Me and Margaret will
take care of him...
1106
00:55:36,400 --> 00:55:37,500
I can't do it, buddy.
1107
00:55:37,600 --> 00:55:39,100
- I gotta have him with me.
- Why not?
1108
00:55:39,100 --> 00:55:41,900
Because I need him. He
keeps my feet on the ground.
1109
00:55:42,200 --> 00:55:44,000
All right, fine.
1110
00:55:44,100 --> 00:55:46,200
I'll bake you a cake and
bring it to you in prison.
1111
00:55:46,300 --> 00:55:49,200
Okay, well, make sure you
throw Stan's saucepan in there.
1112
00:55:49,300 --> 00:55:51,300
I don't have the pan.
1113
00:55:54,000 --> 00:55:57,400
Okay, Mr. and Mrs.
Carlton. Have a lovely day.
1114
00:55:59,600 --> 00:56:01,200
Where are they?
1115
00:56:01,200 --> 00:56:03,200
What do you mean? Just call him.
1116
00:56:03,300 --> 00:56:05,400
He doesn't answer.
He's just like you.
1117
00:56:05,500 --> 00:56:07,600
I... well, I can't talk.
I'm working. I can't.
1118
00:56:07,700 --> 00:56:10,300
Hello, Mrs. C. And how are
you today, young ladies?
1119
00:56:10,400 --> 00:56:11,800
- Hi, Stan!
- Score a goal,
1120
00:56:11,900 --> 00:56:13,600
there's a box of Cracker
Jacks in there for you.
1121
00:56:13,700 --> 00:56:15,200
Cracker Jacks are no
good for her teeth.
1122
00:56:15,200 --> 00:56:17,200
There's gonna be an Amber Alert.
1123
00:56:17,500 --> 00:56:19,000
What do you mean? You
called the cops on him?
1124
00:56:19,100 --> 00:56:20,700
Where is Ezzie?
1125
00:56:22,500 --> 00:56:24,900
He's with his father. You
shouldn't have done that.
1126
00:56:25,000 --> 00:56:27,100
That's a... that's a
very bad thing to do.
1127
00:56:27,200 --> 00:56:28,800
- I did a bad thing?
- Yes.
1128
00:56:28,900 --> 00:56:31,000
- You're making it so he can't see him.
- Max did that!
1129
00:56:31,100 --> 00:56:33,200
- What did you expect him to do?
- Not kidnap him!
1130
00:56:33,300 --> 00:56:36,300
You made it kid... you
made it kidnapping.
1131
00:56:38,100 --> 00:56:39,800
Please. Please.
1132
00:56:39,900 --> 00:56:42,300
- Stan, I don't...
- How could you do that?
1133
00:56:42,400 --> 00:56:44,100
Amber Alert. Do you
know what that is?
1134
00:56:44,200 --> 00:56:46,600
- I don't wanna fight.
- Well, I don't wanna fight either,
1135
00:56:46,700 --> 00:56:48,500
but all of a sudden you
don't believe in him.
1136
00:56:48,600 --> 00:56:50,300
Now you're gonna... Amber Alert?
1137
00:56:50,400 --> 00:56:52,800
I got tired of not knowing what
he was gonna do on any given day.
1138
00:56:52,800 --> 00:56:56,200
I'm already so tired with
Ezzie. Please, I just...
1139
00:56:56,400 --> 00:57:00,300
I'm... I'm scared. I'm tired.
I'm alone. And I need help.
1140
00:57:01,100 --> 00:57:04,000
Rice Krispies boys
make me really tired.
1141
00:57:11,800 --> 00:57:13,700
All right, well,
we're gonna have to...
1142
00:57:13,800 --> 00:57:17,200
we're gonna have to get
to 'em before the cops do.
1143
00:57:18,300 --> 00:57:20,100
- We?
- Yeah, we. Yeah.
1144
00:57:20,200 --> 00:57:22,700
The shift ends,
we start driving.
1145
00:57:23,400 --> 00:57:24,700
Take 11 hours to
get to Michigan.
1146
00:57:24,800 --> 00:57:27,400
Hopefully, get to
them by tomorrow.
1147
00:57:27,900 --> 00:57:29,500
He's at Nick's?
1148
00:57:30,100 --> 00:57:33,700
Yes. He's with Nick. I'm not
happy about that, but yes.
1149
00:57:33,700 --> 00:57:36,100
Unfortunately, we're
going to Nick's. Yeah.
1150
00:57:36,500 --> 00:57:39,300
I have a self-destructive
personality.
1151
00:57:40,000 --> 00:57:42,400
But it's okay 'cause I
recently had a breakthrough.
1152
00:57:42,500 --> 00:57:45,600
After thousands of hours
of hypnosis therapy,
1153
00:57:45,600 --> 00:57:47,900
I finally met my inner child.
1154
00:57:49,200 --> 00:57:50,900
And he had a gun.
1155
00:57:56,400 --> 00:57:58,400
Yeah, oh, hey. What's
up, little guy?
1156
00:57:58,500 --> 00:58:01,100
Whoa. Okay. Well, what?
1157
00:58:01,400 --> 00:58:04,700
Okay, come on. Put... put the
gun down. Put the gun down.
1158
00:58:04,800 --> 00:58:06,300
I'm trying to do a show here.
1159
00:58:06,400 --> 00:58:08,800
Can you get back in my
psyche please? Thank you.
1160
00:58:08,900 --> 00:58:12,700
Anyway, my therapist said to
me, "Max, you're an adult now.
1161
00:58:12,800 --> 00:58:15,600
You don't need your inner child.
He can't help you anymore."
1162
00:58:15,700 --> 00:58:17,300
I said, "Oh, yeah, really, Mark?
1163
00:58:17,400 --> 00:58:18,900
He's got a gun. What do you got?
1164
00:58:19,000 --> 00:58:21,400
I'm taking this little sociopath
with me everywhere I go."
1165
00:58:21,500 --> 00:58:23,300
Thank you, Lansing!
1166
00:58:23,400 --> 00:58:26,000
Great audience.
Have a great night!
1167
00:58:28,900 --> 00:58:32,400
Come on, everybody, let's
hear it for Max Bernal!
1168
00:58:32,700 --> 00:58:34,700
Let's have a, um, whiskey neat
1169
00:58:34,800 --> 00:58:36,800
and another pineapple
juice for my manager here.
1170
00:58:36,900 --> 00:58:38,600
Pineapple juice coming right up.
1171
00:58:38,700 --> 00:58:40,500
You really should
get the boy home.
1172
00:58:40,600 --> 00:58:41,900
- Okay.
- He's your son, right?
1173
00:58:42,000 --> 00:58:44,100
Uh, yeah. That's...
uh, that's my son.
1174
00:58:44,200 --> 00:58:46,200
It's after 12:00.
I was watching him.
1175
00:58:46,300 --> 00:58:47,900
He doesn't seem happy here.
1176
00:58:48,000 --> 00:58:51,100
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on. You
were watching him during my set?
1177
00:58:51,200 --> 00:58:53,200
- And now I'm offended. I got this, Ez.
- No, Dad, Dad...
1178
00:58:53,200 --> 00:58:54,900
- I got it.
- No child should be in this club.
1179
00:58:55,000 --> 00:58:57,100
Especially not a
child with issues.
1180
00:58:57,200 --> 00:58:58,200
- Issues?
- Yeah.
1181
00:58:58,500 --> 00:59:00,200
- I can't hear.
- Really? Let me ask you something.
1182
00:59:00,300 --> 00:59:02,400
Do I come to where you work and
knock the cock outta your mouth?
1183
00:59:02,500 --> 00:59:03,500
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
1184
00:59:03,600 --> 00:59:04,900
- That's my wife.
- Oh, really?
1185
00:59:05,400 --> 00:59:07,200
I'm sorry to hear that, but she
should mind her own fucking business.
1186
00:59:07,300 --> 00:59:08,900
Hey, hey, hey!
1187
00:59:13,200 --> 00:59:14,600
Dad!
1188
00:59:16,300 --> 00:59:17,900
Come on, Ezra!
1189
00:59:23,100 --> 00:59:26,900
- They were the owners.
- Like I said, Ez, I didn't know.
1190
00:59:27,500 --> 00:59:30,400
- They were the owners.
- We covered this already, okay?
1191
00:59:30,500 --> 00:59:32,300
That's enough now.
1192
00:59:32,800 --> 00:59:36,100
- I wanna go home.
- Hey, buddy, I'm sorry, okay?
1193
00:59:36,100 --> 00:59:37,700
- I want to go home!
- It was my bad.
1194
00:59:37,800 --> 00:59:39,700
Okay, listen to me, Ezzie, okay?
1195
00:59:40,200 --> 00:59:43,100
Sometimes life's
gonna get messy, okay?
1196
00:59:43,200 --> 00:59:46,900
And if it does, that's okay.
1197
00:59:47,000 --> 00:59:48,600
You know, people say
life's gotta be neat,
1198
00:59:48,600 --> 00:59:51,200
it's gotta be nice,
but it doesn't.
1199
00:59:52,000 --> 00:59:53,900
- You hear me?
- Yes.
1200
00:59:55,600 --> 00:59:56,900
Okay.
1201
00:59:58,300 --> 01:00:00,300
All right, that's good.
1202
01:00:01,600 --> 01:00:03,600
Go to sleep. That's...
1203
01:00:04,100 --> 01:00:05,900
that's a good idea.
1204
01:00:15,400 --> 01:00:17,800
I really appreciate this, Stan.
1205
01:00:23,400 --> 01:00:25,700
A mother's job is never done.
1206
01:00:26,100 --> 01:00:27,700
Or a father's.
1207
01:00:30,600 --> 01:00:33,200
I guess I don't
even know anymore.
1208
01:00:43,800 --> 01:00:45,800
Here. Turn here. Here.
1209
01:00:53,200 --> 01:00:55,600
There he is. There he is.
Get close. Look, look.
1210
01:00:55,700 --> 01:00:57,600
Okay. Okay.
1211
01:00:59,500 --> 01:01:01,000
Shit!
1212
01:01:01,100 --> 01:01:03,400
Look at your guilt on your face.
1213
01:01:03,500 --> 01:01:05,400
- What are you doing?
- What am I doing?
1214
01:01:05,500 --> 01:01:07,300
- Run, Zorba, run!
- Get off my property!
1215
01:01:07,400 --> 01:01:09,500
Yeah, run! Come on, run!
1216
01:01:09,500 --> 01:01:10,800
- Fuck you, Stan!
- Yeah, fuck you!
1217
01:01:10,800 --> 01:01:13,200
Come on, I told you, I
don't know where they went!
1218
01:01:13,400 --> 01:01:15,600
I thought you had
more sense, Nick.
1219
01:01:15,700 --> 01:01:17,900
Yeah, well, I thought
you had a heart, Jenna.
1220
01:01:18,000 --> 01:01:20,200
- Think about Ezra!
- My kid is out there!
1221
01:01:20,300 --> 01:01:21,400
- Oh! Oh! Oh!
- Where is he?
1222
01:01:21,600 --> 01:01:23,100
I'm gonna plunge this
into your heart right now
1223
01:01:23,100 --> 01:01:24,800
unless you tell me
exactly where they are!
1224
01:01:24,800 --> 01:01:25,900
Where are they?
1225
01:01:26,000 --> 01:01:28,500
They went to go do Kimmel in LA!
1226
01:01:30,700 --> 01:01:31,900
He got Kimmel?
1227
01:01:32,000 --> 01:01:32,800
Yeah.
1228
01:01:32,900 --> 01:01:35,000
I know. He booked Kimmel.
1229
01:01:35,400 --> 01:01:36,400
Can you believe it?
1230
01:01:36,500 --> 01:01:39,900
I mean, he's funny but...
1231
01:01:40,000 --> 01:01:42,300
Wait, please don't tell
Max that I ratted him out.
1232
01:01:42,500 --> 01:01:44,300
I'm not strong.
1233
01:01:44,500 --> 01:01:45,300
- Ow!
- Stop whining!
1234
01:01:45,400 --> 01:01:46,900
God.
1235
01:01:47,000 --> 01:01:48,700
Meet me in the car. I've got
some unfinished business.
1236
01:01:48,700 --> 01:01:51,900
Please, please, don't
leave me alone with him.
1237
01:01:54,000 --> 01:01:57,800
Okay, I'm going to put this in
as loving a way as possible.
1238
01:01:58,100 --> 01:01:59,700
You need help!
1239
01:01:59,700 --> 01:02:01,600
Oh, hi, this is Jayne
Green's assistant.
1240
01:02:01,700 --> 01:02:06,100
I was wanting to confirm the date
and time for Max Bernal's appearance.
1241
01:02:07,800 --> 01:02:10,800
Yes, I, uh, accidentally
deleted an email.
1242
01:02:13,300 --> 01:02:15,600
Oh, great! Thank you so much.
1243
01:02:15,700 --> 01:02:17,800
Appreciate it. Take care.
1244
01:02:18,700 --> 01:02:20,000
Let's go.
1245
01:02:26,900 --> 01:02:28,400
I'm gonna get a coffee.
1246
01:02:28,500 --> 01:02:32,000
- Ooh, there's candy.
- Hey, you've had enough sugar.
1247
01:02:33,000 --> 01:02:34,400
Uh, can I have a
black coffee please?
1248
01:02:34,500 --> 01:02:36,500
- Sure thing.
- Thanks.
1249
01:02:38,400 --> 01:02:42,700
Hey, dude, where can I get a
local motel you can suggest?
1250
01:02:42,800 --> 01:02:44,700
Uh, yeah, you got the
Jersey plates, right?
1251
01:02:44,800 --> 01:02:46,000
- Uh-huh.
- '71 El Do?
1252
01:02:46,100 --> 01:02:47,300
- Yeah.
- Sweet.
1253
01:02:47,700 --> 01:02:50,700
Yeah. Hey, hey, sir, you... you
got a great... great eye for cars.
1254
01:02:50,800 --> 01:02:53,200
Ah, only sort of. Uh, my
grandma's got an El Do.
1255
01:02:53,300 --> 01:02:55,900
So, five exits, Best Western,
includes breakfast and biscuits.
1256
01:02:56,000 --> 01:02:57,800
- Oh. Great. Which way? That way?
- That way.
1257
01:02:57,800 --> 01:02:59,700
Hey, look, I'm on TV!
1258
01:03:00,300 --> 01:03:02,600
Yeah, look at that, buddy. Your
commercial's running everywhere.
1259
01:03:02,700 --> 01:03:03,900
- This should help.
- Yeah.
1260
01:03:04,000 --> 01:03:05,600
Child actor, we're on
our way to Hollywood
1261
01:03:05,700 --> 01:03:07,000
for a big screen test.
1262
01:03:07,100 --> 01:03:08,200
- Not true.
- Why don't you go
1263
01:03:08,300 --> 01:03:10,500
- wait for me in the car, yeah?
- Hey, wait!
1264
01:03:11,000 --> 01:03:13,600
Have I seen you in anything?
1265
01:03:13,700 --> 01:03:17,000
Sanford and Son.
It will be remade!
1266
01:03:18,800 --> 01:03:21,000
Hey, let me get your
autograph. Sign it "To Tim."
1267
01:03:21,100 --> 01:03:23,700
"You'll never catch
me alive, Tim!"
1268
01:03:35,600 --> 01:03:38,000
DUI Checkpoint. What the hell?
1269
01:03:51,000 --> 01:03:52,600
- Whoa!
- What's wrong?
1270
01:03:52,700 --> 01:03:54,300
Nothing! Go back
to sleep, buddy.
1271
01:03:54,400 --> 01:03:56,000
- Come on, it's late.
- What are you doing?
1272
01:03:56,000 --> 01:03:57,900
- Just taking a shortcut.
- To where?
1273
01:03:58,000 --> 01:04:00,800
- Best campsite in Nebraska.
- This isn't a shortcut!
1274
01:04:00,900 --> 01:04:02,300
- Yeah, it is!
- No, it's not!
1275
01:04:02,400 --> 01:04:04,800
I can see the road
right there... shit!
1276
01:04:04,900 --> 01:04:06,800
Fuck!
1277
01:04:06,900 --> 01:04:09,000
Ez? Ez, where are ya? You okay?
1278
01:04:09,100 --> 01:04:10,900
Ezzie?
1279
01:04:11,000 --> 01:04:12,500
I want to go home!
1280
01:04:12,600 --> 01:04:13,800
Ez.
1281
01:04:13,900 --> 01:04:17,800
Ez! Fuck! Fuck!
Hey, come on, buddy!
1282
01:04:20,100 --> 01:04:21,200
Okay.
1283
01:04:21,900 --> 01:04:23,900
Come on, where are you?
1284
01:04:24,000 --> 01:04:25,000
Ez?
1285
01:04:26,100 --> 01:04:27,300
Ezzie?
1286
01:04:30,200 --> 01:04:31,300
Fuck!
1287
01:04:34,300 --> 01:04:35,500
Ezzie!
1288
01:04:40,100 --> 01:04:41,300
Ezzie!
1289
01:04:51,600 --> 01:04:52,800
Ez!
1290
01:04:59,400 --> 01:05:00,700
Ezzie!
1291
01:05:10,900 --> 01:05:12,300
- Hey! Stop!
- No!
1292
01:05:12,400 --> 01:05:13,700
Stop!
1293
01:05:14,200 --> 01:05:16,200
- Hey! Hey! I said stop, okay?
- Ow!
1294
01:05:16,300 --> 01:05:18,500
Stop! I said stop!
1295
01:05:18,600 --> 01:05:20,400
I told you to stop!
1296
01:05:20,500 --> 01:05:22,500
What are you gonna do?
1297
01:05:22,600 --> 01:05:25,600
Hit me? You wanna hit
me? Come on, hit me!
1298
01:05:25,600 --> 01:05:27,000
No! I'm... I'm not, I'm not.
1299
01:05:27,100 --> 01:05:28,400
No, I just... you
scared me, buddy.
1300
01:05:28,500 --> 01:05:30,700
You freaked me out.
I'm sorry. Okay?
1301
01:05:30,900 --> 01:05:32,800
Why did you take me?
1302
01:05:33,100 --> 01:05:35,400
Why did you take me if you
don't know how to help me?
1303
01:05:35,500 --> 01:05:37,100
I don't know, buddy.
1304
01:05:37,200 --> 01:05:39,200
You're my superhero. I
just... you're everything.
1305
01:05:39,300 --> 01:05:41,000
You're my mojo.
1306
01:05:41,100 --> 01:05:43,700
I'm not your superhero!
1307
01:05:43,800 --> 01:05:45,900
I'm not your mojo!
I'm not your buddy!
1308
01:05:46,000 --> 01:05:48,300
I'm your son! And you're my dad!
1309
01:05:48,400 --> 01:05:51,600
My dad! My dad! My
dad! My dad! My dad!
1310
01:05:51,700 --> 01:05:54,000
Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.
1311
01:05:54,200 --> 01:05:56,000
- I hate you.
- It's okay.
1312
01:05:56,100 --> 01:05:59,000
I hate you.
1313
01:06:32,700 --> 01:06:34,700
- Hello?
- Pop?
1314
01:06:36,400 --> 01:06:37,400
Hello?
1315
01:06:37,500 --> 01:06:38,800
I almost hit my kid.
1316
01:06:38,900 --> 01:06:40,800
Wh... what happened?
1317
01:06:40,900 --> 01:06:42,100
What h... what happened?
1318
01:06:42,200 --> 01:06:43,800
- I... I almost...
- What?
1319
01:06:43,900 --> 01:06:45,500
I almost hit Ezra.
1320
01:06:45,900 --> 01:06:47,500
Where are you? Shit.
1321
01:06:47,700 --> 01:06:51,200
- I... I'm in the... I'm in the woods.
- Where, where, where?
1322
01:06:51,300 --> 01:06:53,000
The fucking woods. I
don't know where, okay?
1323
01:06:53,100 --> 01:06:56,100
I just... I almost
hit Ezra, and I...
1324
01:06:56,200 --> 01:06:57,600
I don't know where
to put all this, Pop.
1325
01:06:57,700 --> 01:07:00,300
I don't know where to put
all this fucking rage.
1326
01:07:00,700 --> 01:07:04,100
You don't put it anywhere.
You just... you bury it.
1327
01:07:04,400 --> 01:07:07,700
Yeah, okay. But I'm
asking you, what do I do?
1328
01:07:07,800 --> 01:07:08,900
You know what to
do! You can't...
1329
01:07:08,900 --> 01:07:10,400
I don't. I don't
know what to do, man.
1330
01:07:10,400 --> 01:07:12,200
I'm in a forest,
I'm losing my shit,
1331
01:07:12,300 --> 01:07:14,500
and I don't know what to
do, so I thought that maybe,
1332
01:07:14,600 --> 01:07:16,400
just maybe you might
just be like a normal dad
1333
01:07:16,400 --> 01:07:17,700
and give me some fucking advice!
1334
01:07:17,700 --> 01:07:19,100
Max, shut up. What
are you talking about?
1335
01:07:19,200 --> 01:07:20,700
I'm trying to talk
to you about it now.
1336
01:07:20,700 --> 01:07:21,800
And then you want some advice?
1337
01:07:21,800 --> 01:07:22,900
I'll give you some advice.
1338
01:07:23,000 --> 01:07:24,300
It's this simple.
1339
01:07:24,400 --> 01:07:26,400
Bite your arm off, tie
yourself to a tree,
1340
01:07:26,600 --> 01:07:29,000
do whatever you need to
do to not hit your kid.
1341
01:07:29,100 --> 01:07:31,200
It's that simple.
1342
01:07:32,200 --> 01:07:33,300
You understand?
1343
01:07:33,400 --> 01:07:35,200
Look what happened
with us. It killed me.
1344
01:07:35,300 --> 01:07:38,100
You cannot hit him.
You cannot hit him!
1345
01:07:39,800 --> 01:07:42,000
Okay, I... Yeah, I get it.
1346
01:07:42,400 --> 01:07:43,700
Are you sure you do?
Because if you did,
1347
01:07:43,700 --> 01:07:45,000
you'd know it's time
to throw in the towel
1348
01:07:45,100 --> 01:07:46,100
on this stupid trip.
1349
01:07:46,200 --> 01:07:47,900
- It's not a stupid trip.
- Yes, it is.
1350
01:07:48,000 --> 01:07:49,400
It's not, Pop. It's not stupid.
1351
01:07:49,500 --> 01:07:52,100
Yes, it is. It's stupid.
1352
01:07:52,200 --> 01:07:54,300
How are you gonna feel if
you end up back in jail?
1353
01:07:54,400 --> 01:07:55,800
Then what?
1354
01:07:58,000 --> 01:08:00,900
Where are you?
I'll come get you.
1355
01:08:05,400 --> 01:08:07,600
Fuck. Fuck.
1356
01:08:41,100 --> 01:08:42,800
You can't even say the word.
1357
01:08:42,900 --> 01:08:44,600
It's just a word.
1358
01:08:45,000 --> 01:08:46,200
Autism.
1359
01:08:48,200 --> 01:08:49,800
Yeah, whatever.
1360
01:08:51,800 --> 01:08:56,300
Saying it out loud, it'll
help Ezzie in his life.
1361
01:08:56,400 --> 01:09:00,300
Nah, you know, I don't...
I'm not sure about that.
1362
01:09:02,600 --> 01:09:05,800
We gotta be able to talk
about this and not...
1363
01:09:06,200 --> 01:09:07,900
Okay, tell me. What do
you want to talk about?
1364
01:09:07,900 --> 01:09:09,300
I don't want to be
hiding about it.
1365
01:09:09,400 --> 01:09:11,000
I want to talk about it.
I want to give it a name.
1366
01:09:11,000 --> 01:09:13,000
I want to get... I want to
get all the help we can get.
1367
01:09:13,000 --> 01:09:14,800
Who's hiding? Who's
hiding? Nobody's hiding.
1368
01:09:14,900 --> 01:09:17,500
Max is hiding him right now!
He took him, he's hiding him!
1369
01:09:17,600 --> 01:09:19,400
He's not hiding him, he's
taking him somewhere.
1370
01:09:19,400 --> 01:09:21,300
You think he's gonna
kill him? He's gonna...
1371
01:09:21,400 --> 01:09:23,400
I don't think... of
course I don't think that.
1372
01:09:23,500 --> 01:09:26,300
I don't think that,
but he scared me.
1373
01:09:26,400 --> 01:09:28,800
You know he's gonna take him
somewhere or do something.
1374
01:09:28,900 --> 01:09:31,400
But that doesn't mean he's
gonna do anything bad to him.
1375
01:09:31,500 --> 01:09:32,500
I don't know.
1376
01:09:32,600 --> 01:09:34,300
The fragility of Max
and his mental state,
1377
01:09:34,400 --> 01:09:37,400
and his situ... he's...
he flies off the handle.
1378
01:09:37,500 --> 01:09:39,500
He doesn't know how
to control Ezzie.
1379
01:09:39,700 --> 01:09:41,700
He doesn't know
everything that he needs.
1380
01:09:41,800 --> 01:09:44,300
No, he doesn't. But neither
do you. Nobody knows.
1381
01:09:44,400 --> 01:09:45,900
- I...
- It's what it is.
1382
01:09:46,000 --> 01:09:48,700
It's a condition
that just is there.
1383
01:09:49,000 --> 01:09:50,300
We have to deal with it.
1384
01:09:50,400 --> 01:09:52,000
And I know you...
I know you think
1385
01:09:52,100 --> 01:09:54,200
my side gave him what
you say he's got.
1386
01:09:54,300 --> 01:09:55,800
- I never said that.
- You didn't have to.
1387
01:09:55,800 --> 01:09:57,000
I never said that.
1388
01:09:57,400 --> 01:09:59,100
And my wife did the same thing.
I had the same fights with her.
1389
01:09:59,100 --> 01:10:01,400
- Do not compare me to his mother.
- I'm not comparing you, but...
1390
01:10:01,400 --> 01:10:02,600
Don't compare me to his mother.
1391
01:10:02,700 --> 01:10:04,900
I'm not comparing you,
but there is a similarity.
1392
01:10:05,000 --> 01:10:07,100
I'm sorry. It is what it is.
1393
01:10:07,200 --> 01:10:08,900
I devoted my life
to this family.
1394
01:10:09,000 --> 01:10:13,000
I'm devoting my life to this
family. That woman abandoned him.
1395
01:10:13,800 --> 01:10:16,400
I don't even know what happened
because you don't talk about it,
1396
01:10:16,500 --> 01:10:19,200
and Max doesn't talk about it,
so nobody talks about anything.
1397
01:10:19,300 --> 01:10:22,200
But... but what she
did was unforgivable.
1398
01:10:22,200 --> 01:10:24,300
Don't compare me to her.
1399
01:10:24,900 --> 01:10:26,100
How dare you.
1400
01:10:26,200 --> 01:10:28,600
It was a...
1401
01:10:28,700 --> 01:10:32,100
it was a long time ago,
so it's all over with now.
1402
01:10:40,600 --> 01:10:42,700
I can't believe you
grew up around here.
1403
01:10:42,800 --> 01:10:44,100
Yeah, I know, right?
1404
01:10:44,500 --> 01:10:46,100
Pop-Pop met my
mother in New York,
1405
01:10:46,200 --> 01:10:48,300
and then, well, we
all moved to Nebraska.
1406
01:10:48,400 --> 01:10:50,600
Why did your mother leave?
1407
01:10:53,600 --> 01:10:56,300
Uh, you know, it's funny, buddy.
1408
01:10:56,400 --> 01:10:58,100
I... I don't really know.
1409
01:10:58,200 --> 01:10:59,900
That's not funny.
1410
01:11:00,600 --> 01:11:02,900
You're right. It's not funny.
1411
01:11:04,900 --> 01:11:08,800
You know, I just... I woke up
one morning, and she was gone.
1412
01:11:09,700 --> 01:11:12,000
And I guess, uh,
1413
01:11:12,100 --> 01:11:13,400
I guess after so many years,
1414
01:11:13,500 --> 01:11:15,000
I just worked it out for myself
1415
01:11:15,100 --> 01:11:17,700
that she must have
been pretty sad
1416
01:11:19,000 --> 01:11:21,500
to do something
like that, right?
1417
01:11:21,500 --> 01:11:23,900
She was a terrible mother.
1418
01:11:27,300 --> 01:11:29,300
You're right. She was.
1419
01:11:31,200 --> 01:11:32,500
She was.
1420
01:11:35,800 --> 01:11:38,100
All right, come on. Let's go.
1421
01:11:38,100 --> 01:11:39,400
Hey, folks, thank you again.
1422
01:11:39,500 --> 01:11:42,000
- Thank you so much.
- Bye. Be safe now.
1423
01:11:42,100 --> 01:11:43,900
What a nice couple.
1424
01:11:44,100 --> 01:11:47,300
I bet... I bet they've been
together since they were your age.
1425
01:11:47,400 --> 01:11:51,100
- I'm going to die a virgin.
- What? No, that's bullshit.
1426
01:11:51,400 --> 01:11:54,900
Someone out there
who loves dinosaurs,
1427
01:11:55,000 --> 01:11:57,200
Dostoevsky and Family Guy.
1428
01:11:57,200 --> 01:11:59,600
- You watch.
- And live action DandD.
1429
01:11:59,700 --> 01:12:03,500
And live action DandD. There you
go. You know what you want.
1430
01:12:03,600 --> 01:12:06,500
What are we doing here?
1431
01:12:06,600 --> 01:12:10,700
The lady who lives here is
an old friend of your dad's.
1432
01:12:11,600 --> 01:12:13,900
This place looks like a demon
movie waiting to happen.
1433
01:12:14,100 --> 01:12:16,600
Let's hope not, huh?
1434
01:12:16,700 --> 01:12:19,300
Ah!
1435
01:12:23,400 --> 01:12:25,200
- Oh, my God!
- Oh, hey!
1436
01:12:25,300 --> 01:12:27,500
- Hi.
- What...
1437
01:12:27,600 --> 01:12:30,000
- Hi.
- Oh, no!
1438
01:12:30,100 --> 01:12:31,700
- Hi!
- Hi, Grace. Hi!
1439
01:12:31,800 --> 01:12:32,800
What are you doing here?
1440
01:12:32,900 --> 01:12:34,900
That's a... that's a long story.
1441
01:12:35,000 --> 01:12:38,500
Um, Grace, this is Ezra.
1442
01:12:41,000 --> 01:12:42,800
Nice to meet you, Ezra.
1443
01:12:42,900 --> 01:12:44,900
Heard a lot about you.
1444
01:12:45,500 --> 01:12:47,600
- I've never heard about you.
- Yeah.
1445
01:12:47,700 --> 01:12:49,400
- Who's here, Mom?
- Oh, wow.
1446
01:12:49,500 --> 01:12:52,000
- You're...
- This is my Ruby.
1447
01:12:52,100 --> 01:12:53,800
Way different from
your baby picture.
1448
01:12:53,900 --> 01:12:54,900
I hope so.
1449
01:12:54,900 --> 01:12:56,900
- Hi.
- This is an old friend, Max.
1450
01:12:57,000 --> 01:12:58,700
And his son Ezra.
1451
01:12:59,400 --> 01:13:00,600
Hi.
1452
01:13:00,800 --> 01:13:03,800
Do you wanna come play
with Harper and me?
1453
01:13:07,000 --> 01:13:08,700
Come on! Harper!
1454
01:13:10,000 --> 01:13:12,000
- This is a surprise.
- Yeah, I know.
1455
01:13:12,100 --> 01:13:15,600
- Mm.
- You think we can go inside?
1456
01:13:15,700 --> 01:13:18,100
I'm kind of a
fugitive from the law.
1457
01:13:18,300 --> 01:13:19,700
- What the hell?
- I'm not joking.
1458
01:13:20,700 --> 01:13:22,000
Come on!
1459
01:13:27,700 --> 01:13:28,900
Harper!
1460
01:13:32,600 --> 01:13:33,800
Does...
1461
01:13:34,700 --> 01:13:37,100
does Harper always follow you?
1462
01:13:37,100 --> 01:13:38,200
All the time.
1463
01:13:38,300 --> 01:13:40,100
Lucky dog.
1464
01:13:40,400 --> 01:13:43,600
Get off of me!
1465
01:13:43,700 --> 01:13:47,100
Ridgeway has tried to
push me into Jack's pond.
1466
01:13:47,200 --> 01:13:49,100
- You loved it!
- You wish!
1467
01:13:49,300 --> 01:13:52,800
- You moving on my girl, man?
- Uh, I'm not his girl.
1468
01:13:54,100 --> 01:13:55,500
Introduce us, Rubes.
1469
01:13:55,600 --> 01:13:58,900
- Ezra, Ridgeway and Cally.
- Where are you from?
1470
01:14:01,200 --> 01:14:03,100
He's from back east.
1471
01:14:03,100 --> 01:14:04,500
Wow, look at him go.
1472
01:14:04,600 --> 01:14:07,600
Please don't be a dick.
1473
01:14:07,700 --> 01:14:10,700
"No one cared who I was
until I put on the mask."
1474
01:14:10,800 --> 01:14:13,700
That was pretty random, freak.
1475
01:14:13,800 --> 01:14:16,700
"Who is Bane? Why does
he wear the mask?"
1476
01:14:16,700 --> 01:14:19,300
Dark Knight is my obsession.
1477
01:14:20,100 --> 01:14:21,400
Let's go.
1478
01:14:23,000 --> 01:14:24,100
So tell me again.
1479
01:14:24,200 --> 01:14:26,600
Oh, I just ran out of patience.
1480
01:14:26,600 --> 01:14:28,000
Which happens to all parents.
1481
01:14:28,100 --> 01:14:30,500
Yeah, but what I was seeing...
1482
01:14:30,500 --> 01:14:32,100
He wasn't safe.
1483
01:14:33,200 --> 01:14:34,800
And now he is?
1484
01:14:38,100 --> 01:14:39,900
Appears safe to me.
1485
01:14:42,200 --> 01:14:45,700
- Ugh... I don't know, Max.
- What?
1486
01:14:45,800 --> 01:14:47,100
Why don't you let me call Jenna?
1487
01:14:47,200 --> 01:14:49,100
No, no, no, no. Look, I
already called her, okay?
1488
01:14:49,200 --> 01:14:51,100
She knows he's okay.
1489
01:14:52,800 --> 01:14:53,900
Okay.
1490
01:14:54,400 --> 01:14:55,600
Yeah.
1491
01:14:56,000 --> 01:14:58,600
I'm not gonna fight
you on it, all right?
1492
01:14:58,700 --> 01:15:01,200
So eat your sandwich, wash up,
1493
01:15:01,300 --> 01:15:03,400
and hitchhike off to LA.
1494
01:15:04,400 --> 01:15:07,600
Look, I know this all
seems insane, but...
1495
01:15:07,700 --> 01:15:09,600
- Yeah.
- I didn't know where else to go.
1496
01:15:09,700 --> 01:15:10,800
So...
1497
01:15:12,000 --> 01:15:14,100
So let me help you.
1498
01:15:14,200 --> 01:15:17,400
I can't... I got... I
gotta finish this, Grace.
1499
01:15:17,500 --> 01:15:20,400
I do, you know. That kid is...
1500
01:15:21,000 --> 01:15:22,800
is the one thing that
I can't get wrong.
1501
01:15:22,900 --> 01:15:24,600
That's right. That's
right, you can't.
1502
01:15:24,700 --> 01:15:26,400
- Because he's perfect.
- No.
1503
01:15:26,800 --> 01:15:28,600
He's not, Grace.
He's not perfect.
1504
01:15:28,700 --> 01:15:30,900
And everybody's
trying to make him be
1505
01:15:31,000 --> 01:15:32,200
just like everybody else.
1506
01:15:32,300 --> 01:15:34,300
Me included, right?
1507
01:15:34,400 --> 01:15:36,600
And then one day he
might magically wake up
1508
01:15:36,700 --> 01:15:39,900
and become the
coolest, most amped up
1509
01:15:40,000 --> 01:15:44,000
and normal kid that's ever
walked the face of the earth.
1510
01:15:44,200 --> 01:15:46,500
And that is not gonna happen.
1511
01:15:47,300 --> 01:15:48,600
It's not.
1512
01:15:55,100 --> 01:15:56,400
It's not. It's
never gonna happen.
1513
01:15:56,500 --> 01:15:57,500
So, I have to protect him,
1514
01:15:57,600 --> 01:15:59,800
you know, and if I
can't protect him,
1515
01:15:59,900 --> 01:16:01,600
well, then, he's
not gonna make it.
1516
01:16:01,700 --> 01:16:03,100
And I...
1517
01:16:15,400 --> 01:16:17,800
Do you want caramel or fudge?
1518
01:16:18,900 --> 01:16:20,000
Both.
1519
01:16:20,100 --> 01:16:21,800
You're so bad.
1520
01:16:22,600 --> 01:16:25,400
Oh, my God! You have
to try this, Ezra!
1521
01:16:26,100 --> 01:16:28,900
Come on. I won't take
no for an answer.
1522
01:16:29,200 --> 01:16:30,500
Uh-uh.
1523
01:16:33,200 --> 01:16:35,100
You won't regret it.
1524
01:16:38,300 --> 01:16:40,000
♪ Torn down
1525
01:16:40,100 --> 01:16:41,000
How good is that?
1526
01:16:41,100 --> 01:16:43,200
♪ Full of aching
1527
01:16:43,300 --> 01:16:44,500
♪ Somehow
1528
01:16:44,600 --> 01:16:45,700
You okay?
1529
01:16:45,800 --> 01:16:48,300
♪ Our youth would
take the blame ♪
1530
01:16:48,400 --> 01:16:49,600
♪ Worn out
1531
01:16:49,700 --> 01:16:51,300
Yeah, I mean, nobody uses it.
1532
01:16:51,400 --> 01:16:53,600
Oh, my God.
1533
01:16:55,200 --> 01:16:57,100
- Here she is!
- Oh!
1534
01:16:57,100 --> 01:16:58,100
I gotta lay hands on her.
1535
01:16:58,200 --> 01:16:59,800
Oh, I'm getting the vibes.
1536
01:16:59,900 --> 01:17:01,400
We did everything
in this bucket.
1537
01:17:01,500 --> 01:17:03,600
You know what?
1538
01:17:03,700 --> 01:17:05,800
If she starts, take her.
1539
01:17:06,100 --> 01:17:07,300
- Really?
- Mm-hmm.
1540
01:17:07,400 --> 01:17:09,100
Okay. Thank you.
1541
01:17:09,500 --> 01:17:12,600
I'll... I'll get it back to you
just as soon all this blows over.
1542
01:17:12,700 --> 01:17:15,300
It's okay. It's
gonna be fine, Max.
1543
01:17:15,400 --> 01:17:16,600
It's gonna be fine.
1544
01:17:16,900 --> 01:17:19,600
You just need to
stop biting the dog.
1545
01:17:20,100 --> 01:17:21,300
♪ Climb down
1546
01:17:21,400 --> 01:17:23,500
- What... what do you mean?
- Sixth grade.
1547
01:17:23,600 --> 01:17:26,700
A dog was coming toward
us, and you bit the dog.
1548
01:17:26,800 --> 01:17:27,600
Oh!
1549
01:17:27,700 --> 01:17:29,300
- Yeah, well...
- You bit it.
1550
01:17:29,400 --> 01:17:31,100
I was... I was trying
to protect you.
1551
01:17:31,200 --> 01:17:33,100
- Oh, right. Come on!
- I was protecting you.
1552
01:17:33,200 --> 01:17:36,400
Come on! I mean, the dog wasn't
even gonna bite me or you.
1553
01:17:36,500 --> 01:17:39,400
The poor thing ran off with
its tail between its legs.
1554
01:17:39,500 --> 01:17:41,100
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
1555
01:17:43,300 --> 01:17:46,600
Listen, not everyone is
trying to bite you, Max.
1556
01:17:49,500 --> 01:17:51,300
♪ Hallowed
1557
01:17:51,600 --> 01:17:53,500
You want to feed him?
1558
01:17:54,600 --> 01:17:57,100
Have you ever ridden one before?
1559
01:17:58,700 --> 01:18:00,200
How would you feel
if you left here
1560
01:18:00,300 --> 01:18:02,700
and didn't even pet one
of these gorgeous animals?
1561
01:18:02,800 --> 01:18:04,300
Like a loser.
1562
01:18:04,900 --> 01:18:06,000
Okay.
1563
01:18:06,100 --> 01:18:09,100
So, let's start with
how to greet a horse.
1564
01:18:09,400 --> 01:18:12,900
You approach a horse from
the side so he can see you.
1565
01:18:12,900 --> 01:18:15,700
Then you pat him right here
on the side of his face.
1566
01:18:16,300 --> 01:18:20,200
Then you say in the nicest
way, "Hello, Bosco."
1567
01:18:24,600 --> 01:18:26,500
Hello, pasture king.
1568
01:18:29,600 --> 01:18:31,700
I bet he likes pastures.
1569
01:18:31,800 --> 01:18:33,500
And he likes you.
1570
01:18:33,500 --> 01:18:34,500
You can tell?
1571
01:18:34,600 --> 01:18:35,900
You bet.
1572
01:18:37,000 --> 01:18:39,100
Just look him in the eye.
1573
01:18:39,400 --> 01:18:42,900
Looking a horse in the eye
is like sharing your soul.
1574
01:18:51,000 --> 01:18:52,700
You just made a friend for life.
1575
01:18:52,800 --> 01:18:58,500
♪ I will carry you always
1576
01:18:58,600 --> 01:19:01,000
Uh, Mom, Tom's at the door.
1577
01:19:02,200 --> 01:19:04,200
- Ooh!
- Who's Tom?
1578
01:19:04,300 --> 01:19:06,600
- All right, uh, Max, keys are in the car.
- Okay.
1579
01:19:06,700 --> 01:19:08,700
Cally, Ridgeway, show
him the horse trail.
1580
01:19:08,800 --> 01:19:10,500
- Ruby, take Ezra, go get his bags.
- Okay.
1581
01:19:10,600 --> 01:19:12,600
Go. Go! Go!
1582
01:19:12,700 --> 01:19:14,300
Okay, don't forget
your dinosaur, okay?
1583
01:19:14,300 --> 01:19:16,000
- Go, go.
- Hey.
1584
01:19:17,200 --> 01:19:18,600
I'm sorry.
1585
01:19:19,900 --> 01:19:21,400
That's okay.
1586
01:19:35,400 --> 01:19:38,700
- Hey, Tom, what's up?
- Sorry to bother you, Grace.
1587
01:19:38,800 --> 01:19:39,900
I got a couple swear
1588
01:19:40,000 --> 01:19:41,300
they gave a father
and kid a ride
1589
01:19:41,300 --> 01:19:42,500
and dropped them off here.
1590
01:19:42,600 --> 01:19:44,800
Seems the father kidnapped
the kid from New Jersey.
1591
01:19:44,900 --> 01:19:47,500
That's horrible. What can I do?
1592
01:19:48,000 --> 01:19:49,800
I'm sorry. Would you mind
if I had a look around?
1593
01:19:49,800 --> 01:19:52,600
- This woman's really upset.
- No, not at all. Come on in, Tom.
1594
01:19:52,700 --> 01:19:55,600
- Yeah.
- Thanks. It'll just be a minute.
1595
01:19:59,800 --> 01:20:02,200
- Hey! Don't flood it!
- Okay.
1596
01:20:06,600 --> 01:20:08,400
I guess this is it.
1597
01:20:24,400 --> 01:20:26,800
All right, you two, get a room!
1598
01:20:28,500 --> 01:20:33,100
"I don't mean to be rude, but
that was not as easy as it looked,
1599
01:20:33,200 --> 01:20:36,200
so I would appreciate it if
you wouldn't distract me."
1600
01:20:36,600 --> 01:20:38,800
The Princess Bride.
1601
01:20:38,900 --> 01:20:40,500
Kid's a genius.
1602
01:20:54,900 --> 01:20:56,700
Can we get a horse?
1603
01:20:58,300 --> 01:21:00,400
Dude, we live in Hoboken.
1604
01:21:02,000 --> 01:21:04,300
Yeah. That's what I thought.
1605
01:21:05,500 --> 01:21:09,100
Hey, Ez, you understand why
I'm doing this, don't you?
1606
01:21:09,200 --> 01:21:11,400
Of course, you want
to be on Jimmy Kimmel.
1607
01:21:11,500 --> 01:21:12,500
Any father would.
1608
01:21:12,600 --> 01:21:14,800
No, no. That's not it.
1609
01:21:15,400 --> 01:21:19,100
I mean, s-sure, but
it's more than that.
1610
01:21:19,200 --> 01:21:21,600
You know, um...
1611
01:21:21,700 --> 01:21:24,100
you know how Pop-Pop
gave up being a chef
1612
01:21:24,300 --> 01:21:27,100
and then he took that
job as a doorman?
1613
01:21:27,800 --> 01:21:29,900
Well, he did that for me.
1614
01:21:32,000 --> 01:21:33,900
That makes no sense.
1615
01:21:34,200 --> 01:21:38,200
Well, that makes perfect
sense, actually, buddy.
1616
01:21:38,800 --> 01:21:40,200
Because...
1617
01:21:41,300 --> 01:21:44,500
because, you know, a dad's job
1618
01:21:44,700 --> 01:21:47,300
is to take his son
down the field.
1619
01:21:47,700 --> 01:21:50,400
- What field?
- Any field, you know?
1620
01:21:50,500 --> 01:21:51,500
Football field.
1621
01:21:51,600 --> 01:21:53,200
Football causes brain injuries.
1622
01:21:53,300 --> 01:21:56,800
Okay, that's true, but in this
case, it's a metaphor, right?
1623
01:21:56,900 --> 01:22:01,000
- Right.
- So... so a dad's gotta...
1624
01:22:01,100 --> 01:22:02,800
he's gotta go down
that field, right?
1625
01:22:02,900 --> 01:22:06,000
And... and if he gets
tackled before he scores...
1626
01:22:06,100 --> 01:22:08,900
- Game over.
- Except that it's not.
1627
01:22:09,000 --> 01:22:10,700
'Cause all that
dad wants, right,
1628
01:22:10,900 --> 01:22:16,200
is... is for that kid to pick up
the ball where his dad got tackled
1629
01:22:16,300 --> 01:22:17,900
and to take it the
rest of the way.
1630
01:22:18,000 --> 01:22:19,300
- Touchdown!
- Exactly.
1631
01:22:19,400 --> 01:22:22,200
He's gotta keep going
until he scores.
1632
01:22:25,600 --> 01:22:26,900
Anyway...
1633
01:22:29,300 --> 01:22:31,700
that's why I'm going to Kimmel.
1634
01:22:37,600 --> 01:22:39,400
You're a good dad.
1635
01:23:19,200 --> 01:23:23,400
You want some coffee?
1636
01:23:23,500 --> 01:23:25,200
Yeah. Love some.
1637
01:23:26,400 --> 01:23:28,500
Why don't you get a table in
the House of Pies over there.
1638
01:23:28,500 --> 01:23:31,300
I'll meet you right there.
I just wanna fill it up.
1639
01:23:31,600 --> 01:23:33,200
I'll see you inside.
1640
01:23:33,300 --> 01:23:34,400
See you inside.
1641
01:23:34,800 --> 01:23:35,800
What do you wanna drink?
1642
01:23:35,900 --> 01:23:37,600
"Life's a sport, drink it up."
1643
01:23:37,700 --> 01:23:39,100
Okay. What's that code for?
1644
01:23:39,200 --> 01:23:41,500
"Looks like we've got another
mystery on our hands."
1645
01:23:41,600 --> 01:23:45,000
I love the quotes, okay, but
not for every situation, right?
1646
01:23:45,100 --> 01:23:47,400
This nice lady's
got her work to do.
1647
01:23:47,500 --> 01:23:49,200
Iced tea, please.
1648
01:23:50,600 --> 01:23:51,800
My man, Ezra.
1649
01:23:51,900 --> 01:23:54,800
Dropping quotes and
flying without a net
1650
01:23:54,800 --> 01:23:57,400
so that he could
order himself a...
1651
01:23:57,400 --> 01:23:59,200
"Iced tea, please."
1652
01:24:09,300 --> 01:24:12,400
- Where you going?
- Hey, what's going on?
1653
01:24:12,500 --> 01:24:13,700
My name's Ezra.
1654
01:24:13,800 --> 01:24:16,500
And I'm going to
tell you all a joke.
1655
01:24:17,200 --> 01:24:19,900
Where do horses go
when they're sick?
1656
01:24:20,600 --> 01:24:22,400
To the horsepital!
1657
01:24:25,400 --> 01:24:26,500
Yeah.
1658
01:24:26,600 --> 01:24:29,700
Thank you! You've been
a wonderful audience!
1659
01:24:30,800 --> 01:24:33,100
Wow. First original joke.
1660
01:24:33,200 --> 01:24:36,400
- I'm proud of you.
- New material is not easy.
1661
01:24:48,600 --> 01:24:52,000
Hey, buddy, I'm gonna go,
um, wash my hands, okay?
1662
01:24:52,100 --> 01:24:53,300
- I'll be right back.
- Okay.
1663
01:24:53,400 --> 01:24:54,600
Okay.
1664
01:24:56,500 --> 01:24:58,300
To the horsepital.
1665
01:24:59,000 --> 01:25:00,000
To the horsepital.
1666
01:25:00,100 --> 01:25:01,300
What are you doing here?
1667
01:25:01,400 --> 01:25:02,800
Never mind that.
Listen, I need to...
1668
01:25:02,800 --> 01:25:04,200
- How did you find me?
- We don't have time for this.
1669
01:25:04,300 --> 01:25:05,800
How did you find me
all the way out here?
1670
01:25:05,800 --> 01:25:07,500
We were at the House of
Pies. I saw you over there.
1671
01:25:07,500 --> 01:25:09,600
- Who? We who?
- Me and Jenna. She's there.
1672
01:25:09,700 --> 01:25:11,400
- It's okay.
- Je... Okay.
1673
01:25:11,600 --> 01:25:13,800
Oh, Pop, you got some
balls. Listen to me.
1674
01:25:13,900 --> 01:25:15,300
- Will you shut up?
- No, you shut up.
1675
01:25:15,300 --> 01:25:16,700
I'm trying to tell
you something.
1676
01:25:16,800 --> 01:25:18,100
You go back to
the House of Pies,
1677
01:25:18,200 --> 01:25:19,500
and you never saw me.
1678
01:25:19,600 --> 01:25:21,200
Shut up. I'm trying
to tell you something.
1679
01:25:21,200 --> 01:25:23,300
I'm not here to stop you.
1680
01:25:26,500 --> 01:25:28,800
I'm here to apologize.
1681
01:25:28,900 --> 01:25:31,100
- For what?
- Well... Look.
1682
01:25:31,100 --> 01:25:33,300
I'm sorry.
1683
01:25:33,400 --> 01:25:36,900
I... you know, I...
that's all, I'm sorry.
1684
01:25:37,600 --> 01:25:40,900
What are you talking
about? What happened? What?
1685
01:25:41,100 --> 01:25:43,500
Your mother left, and...
1686
01:25:43,700 --> 01:25:46,200
and I loved her, but I... I
was impossible to live with,
1687
01:25:46,300 --> 01:25:48,300
and I never really told you
about any of that, and so, I...
1688
01:25:48,300 --> 01:25:50,000
- I'm sorry.
- What do you mean?
1689
01:25:50,100 --> 01:25:51,700
Mom left because I
was a pain in the ass.
1690
01:25:51,700 --> 01:25:53,900
- That's what you told me.
- No, I was the pain in the ass.
1691
01:25:53,900 --> 01:25:56,600
It was me. All I ever did was
fight. And every fight I ever had
1692
01:25:56,700 --> 01:25:58,500
was against someone I
thought had it in for me.
1693
01:25:58,500 --> 01:26:00,300
And those kinds of fights
you never really win.
1694
01:26:00,400 --> 01:26:04,100
You just go from one person to
another until there's nobody left.
1695
01:26:04,200 --> 01:26:07,900
And then when I wasn't
fighting, I was...
1696
01:26:08,000 --> 01:26:10,200
I was... I was
hiding... I was hiding
1697
01:26:10,300 --> 01:26:12,400
in restaurant
kitchens, boxing gyms.
1698
01:26:12,500 --> 01:26:16,000
I was... Now I'm hiding holding
doors open for strangers.
1699
01:26:16,100 --> 01:26:18,100
I'm... I'm... I just...
1700
01:26:21,100 --> 01:26:24,400
I hid because I didn't
know what else to do, I...
1701
01:26:24,600 --> 01:26:27,100
I didn't know how to do
what I see you doing.
1702
01:26:27,200 --> 01:26:28,000
What?
1703
01:26:28,100 --> 01:26:29,200
You're fighting for something
1704
01:26:29,200 --> 01:26:31,100
that means something.
1705
01:26:31,400 --> 01:26:34,300
Maybe it's too much, but you're
trying to do the right thing.
1706
01:26:34,400 --> 01:26:36,500
And you're in the fight
of your life for your son.
1707
01:26:36,600 --> 01:26:38,900
And if you get arrested,
you're gonna get arrested.
1708
01:26:39,000 --> 01:26:42,900
But as far as I'm concerned,
you're my heavyweight champion.
1709
01:26:43,700 --> 01:26:45,700
'Cause I had a problem.
1710
01:26:45,900 --> 01:26:49,600
I had a problem with your
mother, and I'll never forget.
1711
01:26:50,900 --> 01:26:53,600
I wish that I had
done what you did.
1712
01:26:54,300 --> 01:26:55,900
You might have to
suffer consequences,
1713
01:26:56,000 --> 01:26:59,300
but it's... it's worth it 'cause
you did it for the right reasons.
1714
01:26:59,500 --> 01:27:02,400
You did it because
you love your kid.
1715
01:27:03,600 --> 01:27:06,900
Taking him out of the bed in
the middle of the night...
1716
01:27:07,000 --> 01:27:08,600
- A felony.
- No, no, no.
1717
01:27:08,700 --> 01:27:10,700
Took a lot of courage.
1718
01:27:10,700 --> 01:27:13,200
Believe it or not, it might've been
the best thing you ever could've done.
1719
01:27:13,200 --> 01:27:16,900
And what you're always worried about,
not having a family, you gotta stop that.
1720
01:27:17,000 --> 01:27:20,000
And I'm here, and Ezzie's there,
1721
01:27:20,100 --> 01:27:22,300
and the woman in the
House of Pies, well,
1722
01:27:22,400 --> 01:27:23,900
it'll all be all right with her.
1723
01:27:24,000 --> 01:27:27,000
That'll all work itself out
eventually, but you gotta know
1724
01:27:27,100 --> 01:27:28,500
that you have a
family that loves you
1725
01:27:28,600 --> 01:27:31,700
and that needs you and
that cares about you.
1726
01:27:31,800 --> 01:27:33,900
- Now be careful.
- Okay.
1727
01:27:33,900 --> 01:27:36,100
- I gotta get back.
- Okay.
1728
01:27:37,000 --> 01:27:38,200
Okay.
1729
01:27:50,500 --> 01:27:52,800
All right, so you recognize
any of these names, buddy?
1730
01:27:52,900 --> 01:27:54,800
Yeah. Sidney Poitier.
1731
01:27:55,300 --> 01:27:57,900
"They call me Mr. Tibbs."
1732
01:27:58,000 --> 01:28:01,200
Of course. Stupid
question. My bad.
1733
01:28:01,300 --> 01:28:04,400
"Toto, I have a feeling
we're not in Kansas anymore."
1734
01:28:04,500 --> 01:28:06,600
- Dorothy is Liza Minelli's mom.
- Okay.
1735
01:28:06,700 --> 01:28:08,500
- And that's a fact.
- Pick up the pace, okay?
1736
01:28:08,600 --> 01:28:10,700
- Come on.
- "Crying?
1737
01:28:10,800 --> 01:28:13,500
There's no crying in baseball!"
1738
01:28:13,900 --> 01:28:16,400
Come on. Come on.
1739
01:28:18,400 --> 01:28:21,300
- Is Jimmy here?
- He might stop in to say hi.
1740
01:28:21,400 --> 01:28:22,900
Oh, good. My son's a big fan.
1741
01:28:23,000 --> 01:28:24,500
No, I'm not.
1742
01:28:25,800 --> 01:28:27,200
Park there.
1743
01:28:27,200 --> 01:28:29,000
- This is handicap.
- Yeah. Take the spot.
1744
01:28:29,100 --> 01:28:31,700
- It's handicap.
- Take that spot.
1745
01:28:33,500 --> 01:28:35,600
Do as much of your set as
you want for the soundcheck.
1746
01:28:35,600 --> 01:28:37,700
- How's the mojo today, good?
- Good till the last drop.
1747
01:28:37,700 --> 01:28:38,800
- Hey, Max.
- Yeah.
1748
01:28:38,900 --> 01:28:40,000
- See the box?
- Uh-huh.
1749
01:28:40,200 --> 01:28:41,500
Don't step outside the
box, don't look at Jimmy,
1750
01:28:41,500 --> 01:28:42,800
and do not go over your time.
1751
01:28:42,900 --> 01:28:44,000
- You good?
- Jesus. At ease.
1752
01:28:44,100 --> 01:28:45,600
- Batteries in this thing?
- I hope so.
1753
01:28:45,600 --> 01:28:47,700
- Ezra, I got a front row seat for you.
- Okay.
1754
01:28:47,800 --> 01:28:50,600
Check, check, check. Is that
mic down over there? That's it?
1755
01:28:50,700 --> 01:28:53,600
Great. Thanks. How's
everybody doing tonight?
1756
01:28:53,700 --> 01:28:56,100
Good? Hello? Ah.
1757
01:28:56,200 --> 01:28:58,400
I gotta stay in the box.
Gotta stay in the box.
1758
01:28:58,500 --> 01:28:59,500
Hi there.
1759
01:28:59,600 --> 01:29:02,100
Hi, did Max Bernal
arrive with a young boy?
1760
01:29:02,200 --> 01:29:03,700
Both very handsome.
1761
01:29:03,800 --> 01:29:06,300
Just have a way of looking at
things through a negative lens.
1762
01:29:06,400 --> 01:29:08,700
Which makes sense, you
know, I was a breach baby.
1763
01:29:08,800 --> 01:29:11,500
My dad says I came
out with a black eye.
1764
01:29:11,600 --> 01:29:13,600
He says I popped out, and
the first thing I said was,
1765
01:29:13,600 --> 01:29:15,300
"Who thought this
was a good idea?"
1766
01:29:15,400 --> 01:29:17,500
It's right through here.
1767
01:29:18,400 --> 01:29:19,700
My son came up to
me the other day,
1768
01:29:19,700 --> 01:29:21,700
he said, "Dad,
you're an awfulizer."
1769
01:29:21,800 --> 01:29:23,600
I said, "Honey, I don't
think "awfulizer" is a word."
1770
01:29:23,600 --> 01:29:25,100
- He says, "Yes, it is."
- Yeah!
1771
01:29:25,300 --> 01:29:26,500
There he is, my son.
1772
01:29:26,600 --> 01:29:28,200
I think he might be on
to something actually.
1773
01:29:28,300 --> 01:29:29,400
I think I am an awfulizer.
1774
01:29:29,500 --> 01:29:30,700
Because truth be told
1775
01:29:30,800 --> 01:29:32,800
I can take any
situation and just...
1776
01:29:32,900 --> 01:29:34,100
make it worse.
1777
01:29:34,200 --> 01:29:36,600
Mr. Bernal. I'm
Special Agent Costa.
1778
01:29:36,700 --> 01:29:39,600
FBI. We're here to
take you into custody.
1779
01:29:41,000 --> 01:29:42,800
Okay. I... I can't believe this.
1780
01:29:42,900 --> 01:29:45,000
- Can you not do this in front of my kid?
- Hi, Ezra.
1781
01:29:45,100 --> 01:29:46,300
I'm Jessica.
1782
01:29:46,400 --> 01:29:47,900
We're going to take a
little walk, all right?
1783
01:29:48,000 --> 01:29:50,400
I've travelled all the way
across the country with my son.
1784
01:29:50,500 --> 01:29:53,700
I understand that you
came across the country.
1785
01:29:54,000 --> 01:29:55,500
Ezzie, it's fine. It's fine.
1786
01:29:55,600 --> 01:29:58,400
- Let's go get some ice cream.
- Ezzie.
1787
01:29:58,400 --> 01:30:00,200
Your daddy just needs to
talk to my friend Joe.
1788
01:30:00,200 --> 01:30:02,100
Everything's fine,
Ezra, okay? My...
1789
01:30:02,200 --> 01:30:04,400
Don't touch my kid!
1790
01:30:04,500 --> 01:30:06,500
- Don't touch my son!
- He doesn't like to be touched!
1791
01:30:06,600 --> 01:30:09,400
- Don't touch him!
- It's okay, Ezzie.
1792
01:30:09,400 --> 01:30:10,700
It's okay. It's
okay. Look, I know.
1793
01:30:10,700 --> 01:30:12,300
I called you myself,
and I made a mistake.
1794
01:30:12,300 --> 01:30:14,400
It's okay, Ezzie. It's
okay. We're all here.
1795
01:30:14,500 --> 01:30:16,300
It's okay. It's okay, Ezzie.
1796
01:30:16,400 --> 01:30:18,100
- Ma'am, I need you to back off.
- I need you to back off!
1797
01:30:18,200 --> 01:30:19,500
This is my son. Hi!
1798
01:30:19,700 --> 01:30:22,800
Hey, baby. Ezzie.
Hey, buddy. You okay?
1799
01:30:22,900 --> 01:30:25,000
Hi. Hi.
1800
01:30:25,300 --> 01:30:28,500
Ezzie, I missed you.
1801
01:30:29,500 --> 01:30:32,300
Ez? You okay, buddy?
1802
01:30:32,400 --> 01:30:35,400
Did you have a good
time? How was the trip?
1803
01:30:38,100 --> 01:30:40,800
- I talked to a horse.
- What?
1804
01:30:40,900 --> 01:30:42,700
That's amazing.
1805
01:30:42,800 --> 01:30:44,800
I wish I'd been there.
1806
01:30:57,900 --> 01:31:01,300
I'm sorry, ma'am, but we still
need to arrest Mr. Bernal.
1807
01:31:01,400 --> 01:31:03,400
I'm the one who called
you. I made a mistake.
1808
01:31:03,500 --> 01:31:06,200
As you can see, my
son is fine, so...
1809
01:31:06,200 --> 01:31:08,200
- We don't have a choice, ma'am.
- You do have a choice.
1810
01:31:08,300 --> 01:31:11,300
I am his mother, this is his
father, this is his grandfather.
1811
01:31:11,800 --> 01:31:15,700
We are a family, and we are
taking him home together.
1812
01:31:15,800 --> 01:31:18,700
So thank you very much. There's
no need for any of this anymore.
1813
01:31:18,800 --> 01:31:21,500
- Okay, everybody just stay calm.
- Hey, man. It's okay.
1814
01:31:21,600 --> 01:31:24,500
- You need to calm down.
- No, I am calm.
1815
01:31:25,000 --> 01:31:26,600
Hey! He's not resisting!
1816
01:31:26,700 --> 01:31:28,800
I'm not resisting. She's not
pressing charges, right, Jenna?
1817
01:31:28,800 --> 01:31:31,000
- We're calling off the charges.
- Come on! Stop!
1818
01:31:31,100 --> 01:31:32,800
Dad!
1819
01:31:33,300 --> 01:31:35,600
Get off my dad!
1820
01:31:36,600 --> 01:31:38,300
- Get off!
- I gotta finish.
1821
01:31:38,400 --> 01:31:41,300
Dad, eyes. Dad! Dad! Eyes.
1822
01:31:41,400 --> 01:31:44,000
It's okay. It's okay.
1823
01:31:44,200 --> 01:31:45,900
You got tackled.
1824
01:31:47,000 --> 01:31:48,700
Give me the ball.
1825
01:32:04,200 --> 01:32:06,100
Calm down. It's okay.
1826
01:32:07,000 --> 01:32:08,100
Okay.
1827
01:32:29,800 --> 01:32:32,100
- Okay. Let's go!
- Coming.
1828
01:32:32,200 --> 01:32:35,900
Come on, come on, come on.
We're gonna be late! Come on!
1829
01:32:36,200 --> 01:32:38,400
Morning. I know you have to deal
with this house arrest stuff,
1830
01:32:38,400 --> 01:32:40,200
but would you mind picking
him up from school?
1831
01:32:40,300 --> 01:32:41,700
I have an inspection
I can't get out of.
1832
01:32:41,700 --> 01:32:44,100
Yeah. Sure. I just have
to tell my probation guy.
1833
01:32:44,200 --> 01:32:46,100
Okay. Hey, hey, hey.
1834
01:32:46,200 --> 01:32:48,500
Remember, just
don't talk too fast.
1835
01:32:48,600 --> 01:32:50,600
What you did last
night was brilliant.
1836
01:32:50,800 --> 01:32:55,400
"For Whom The Bell Tolls.
Today, it tolls for me."
1837
01:32:55,500 --> 01:32:58,200
That's gonna be a
good presentation.
1838
01:32:58,500 --> 01:33:00,200
- All right, bye-bye. Break a leg.
- Come on.
1839
01:33:00,300 --> 01:33:02,800
Let's go before
they lock us out.
1840
01:33:03,500 --> 01:33:05,200
- Want me to carry that?
- Sure.
1841
01:33:05,700 --> 01:33:08,400
You know, when
Hemingway was my age,
1842
01:33:08,500 --> 01:33:12,000
you know what his parents
got him for his birthday?
1843
01:33:12,100 --> 01:33:13,400
No, what?
1844
01:33:13,400 --> 01:33:16,400
His dad got him a shotgun,
1845
01:33:16,500 --> 01:33:18,900
and his mom, a violin.
1846
01:33:20,400 --> 01:33:23,300
- Hemingway played the violin?
- No.
1847
01:33:23,800 --> 01:33:26,900
Fifty years later, he
used that shotgun to...
1848
01:33:28,400 --> 01:33:29,600
Really?
1849
01:33:30,200 --> 01:33:31,600
Look it up.
1850
01:33:31,800 --> 01:33:33,500
Wow. I did not know that.
1851
01:33:33,600 --> 01:33:36,500
Well, guess who's
getting violin lessons.
1852
01:33:38,200 --> 01:33:40,800
Oh, buddy, I'm so happy you're
excited about this school, huh?
1853
01:33:40,900 --> 01:33:42,900
- Finally got it right.
- Yeah.
1854
01:33:43,000 --> 01:33:44,600
Mom was right.
1855
01:33:45,800 --> 01:33:47,700
Can't you cover that
thing with your sock?
1856
01:33:47,800 --> 01:33:49,900
What? I don't like the
way it feels on my skin.
1857
01:33:50,000 --> 01:33:52,200
- Texture thing, you know?
- It's blinking.
1858
01:33:52,300 --> 01:33:53,700
- Beep.
- Okay. You know what?
1859
01:33:53,800 --> 01:33:56,000
Are you gonna bring it in?
1860
01:33:56,200 --> 01:33:57,300
Fine.
1861
01:34:00,400 --> 01:34:01,700
You can go now.
1862
01:34:01,800 --> 01:34:02,900
Okay.
1863
01:34:11,000 --> 01:34:12,700
Have a good day.
1864
01:34:42,200 --> 01:34:45,000
Remember, the last time this
guy was here, he got arrested.
1865
01:34:45,100 --> 01:34:46,500
Oh, wow.
1866
01:34:46,600 --> 01:34:48,900
- Max?
- Jimmy?
1867
01:34:49,000 --> 01:34:51,000
- Hey, man. How you doing?
- Man, you look great.
1868
01:34:51,100 --> 01:34:53,000
Great to have you here.
This is Guillermo.
1869
01:34:53,100 --> 01:34:55,200
- Hi. Nice to meet you.
- Top security guy.
1870
01:34:55,300 --> 01:34:57,500
- How's your son doing?
- Ezzie's great, man, yeah.
1871
01:34:57,600 --> 01:35:00,000
He'd be here, but you know, I
can't take him out of the state.
1872
01:35:00,000 --> 01:35:02,800
Yeah, right. Guess not.
Yeah, I guess he can't.
1873
01:35:02,900 --> 01:35:06,500
So, I was telling him, remember
the last time Max was here,
1874
01:35:06,600 --> 01:35:09,500
he was almost on the
show, but he got arrested.
1875
01:35:09,600 --> 01:35:12,800
He, um, rescued his
son from school.
1876
01:35:12,900 --> 01:35:14,400
- Yeah?
- That's how I see it.
1877
01:35:14,500 --> 01:35:15,600
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
1878
01:35:15,700 --> 01:35:17,800
But, uh, anyway, it's
great to have you here.
1879
01:35:17,900 --> 01:35:19,400
Sorry about that.
1880
01:35:19,500 --> 01:35:20,700
I forgot to tell you.
1881
01:35:21,200 --> 01:35:25,100
I gotta bring... I had to bring
my probation officer with me.
1882
01:35:25,600 --> 01:35:28,500
- This is your probation officer?
- Yeah.
1883
01:35:28,500 --> 01:35:29,800
Wow.
1884
01:35:29,900 --> 01:35:31,000
Yeah.
1885
01:35:31,100 --> 01:35:33,000
- He has to stay with you all the time?
- Yeah.
1886
01:35:33,100 --> 01:35:35,500
- He's very cute.
- Hey, man. What's up?
1887
01:35:35,600 --> 01:35:36,900
I'll be right here, all right?
1888
01:35:37,000 --> 01:35:39,500
At least he's a
good-looking guy.
1889
01:35:39,700 --> 01:35:41,300
- All right, well, break a leg.
- Okay.
1890
01:35:41,200 --> 01:35:43,800
- Glad you're finally here.
- Safety first.
1891
01:35:43,900 --> 01:35:45,300
- Yeah. Thanks.
- Yeah, that's true.
1892
01:35:45,400 --> 01:35:48,400
- I'll see you out there.
- Okay. See you.
1893
01:35:49,500 --> 01:35:52,400
♪ I remember that
shirt you had ♪
1894
01:35:52,500 --> 01:35:55,400
♪ Bought the same one
So we would match ♪
1895
01:35:55,500 --> 01:35:58,600
♪ Snuck into your
bedroom Window ♪
1896
01:35:58,600 --> 01:36:01,700
♪ Footprints let us go
1897
01:36:01,800 --> 01:36:04,800
♪ You wear a wig and glasses
1898
01:36:04,900 --> 01:36:08,100
♪ I smoke and hide the ashes
1899
01:36:08,200 --> 01:36:10,800
♪ I'll carry you downfield
1900
01:36:10,800 --> 01:36:14,300
♪ Code only yours to reveal
1901
01:36:14,400 --> 01:36:17,400
♪ So let yourself be Ezra
1902
01:36:17,500 --> 01:36:20,500
♪ We'll sing the
words To your song ♪
1903
01:36:20,600 --> 01:36:23,600
♪ So let yourself be Ezra
1904
01:36:23,700 --> 01:36:26,800
♪ You don't have to
right What's wrong ♪
1905
01:36:26,900 --> 01:36:30,100
♪ And in the morning
Can't you see ♪
1906
01:36:30,100 --> 01:36:33,100
♪ The sun is
coming up For you ♪
1907
01:36:33,100 --> 01:36:35,800
♪ Your timing's
never Too soon ♪
1908
01:36:35,900 --> 01:36:40,000
♪ Everybody needs a light
1909
01:36:51,800 --> 01:36:54,800
♪ We're dancing in the car
1910
01:36:54,900 --> 01:36:58,300
♪ We're fighting after dark
1911
01:36:58,400 --> 01:37:00,800
♪ But when the sun comes up
1912
01:37:01,000 --> 01:37:04,100
♪ I'm glad to be kids like us
1913
01:37:04,600 --> 01:37:07,600
♪ I hope you one
day You learn ♪
1914
01:37:07,600 --> 01:37:10,700
♪ I'm here to ease the burn
1915
01:37:10,800 --> 01:37:13,400
♪ Growing up never ends
1916
01:37:13,600 --> 01:37:16,700
♪ But we won't
break, We'll bend ♪
1917
01:37:16,900 --> 01:37:20,100
♪ So let yourself be Ezra ♪
1918
01:37:20,200 --> 01:37:23,300
♪ We'll sing the
words To your song ♪
1919
01:37:23,400 --> 01:37:26,500
♪ So let yourself be Ezra
1920
01:37:26,600 --> 01:37:29,700
♪ You don't have to
right What's wrong ♪
1921
01:37:29,800 --> 01:37:32,700
♪ And in the morning
Can't you see ♪
1922
01:37:32,800 --> 01:37:35,800
♪ The sun is
coming up For you ♪
1923
01:37:35,900 --> 01:37:38,600
♪ Your timing's
never Too soon ♪
1924
01:37:38,700 --> 01:37:42,200
♪ Everybody needs a light
1925
01:37:42,300 --> 01:37:45,100
♪ So let yourself be Ezra
1926
01:37:45,200 --> 01:37:48,500
♪ We'll sing the
words To your song ♪
1927
01:37:48,600 --> 01:37:51,200
♪ So let yourself be Ezra
1928
01:37:51,300 --> 01:37:54,700
♪ You don't have to
right What's wrong ♪
1929
01:37:54,800 --> 01:37:57,800
♪ And in the morning
Can't you see ♪
1930
01:37:57,900 --> 01:38:00,900
♪ The sun is
coming up For you ♪
1931
01:38:00,900 --> 01:38:03,600
♪ Your timing's
never Too soon ♪
1932
01:38:03,700 --> 01:38:07,200
♪ Everybody needs
1933
01:38:08,400 --> 01:38:11,300
♪ A light